Monthly Archives: June 2021

WINGSPREAD Ezine for June, 2021


“Spreading your wings in a perplexing world”

June, 2021                                                  James P. Hurd

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Contents

  • New story: “Polygamous Navigation”
  • How to purchase Wingspread: A Memoir of Faith and Flying
  • Puzzler of the month
  • Writer’s Corner
  • Wingspread E-zine subscription information

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 New story: Polygamous Navigation

Driving alone I sometimes get lost, but it’s simpler than when my wife and I travel together. When I know where I’m going, I go there (and only occasionally blow past a turn when I get too absorbed in listening to Public Radio). Like other guys, if I don’t know where I’m going, I never stop to ask for directions. I usually follow Penelope’s instructions, the pleasant British-accented voice on my Waze GPS.

My wife trusts my driving implicitly, but she considers navigation more of a team sport. If Penelope is turned off, our conversation goes something like this:

“Do you know how to get there?”

“No; I’m just going to go to the general area and drive around honking until someone helps us.”

(Eyeroll) “Fine; I’ll just keep quiet, then. . .”

“Sorry.”

Why don’t you turn here?”

“We can turn here if you wish.”

“Will that get us there faster?”

“I dunno. We can turn if you want. . . .”

To read more, click here:   https://jimhurd.com/2021/06/12/polygamous-navigation/

Puzzler for June

The “Don’t Look Back” promo tour
(Thanks to Car Talk)

The company that Bobo works for just finished a new product. They wanted to promote it across the country. Bobo was asked to travel by car to each of the 48 contiguous U.S. states to promote the product. He was told that he could visit each state in whatever order he chose, but the company wanted him to start in Delaware, at their headquarters.

They asked that he visit each state only once. He could not drive back into a state he had already visited—this was the “Don’t Look Back” product tour. So, Bobo sat down at his desk and began to plan his trip.

He realized immediately that it was going to be one long car trip. At that moment, his boss stopped by and said, “Hey, I’m going to join you when you reach your last state. I was born there and I’ve been looking for a reason to go back and visit. You can leave your rental car there, and I’ll fly you back in my private jet.”

Since Bobo hadn’t planned his trip yet, how did his boss know which state was going to be Bobo’s last state? And, which state would that be?

Answer to May’s puzzler: 

At least two of you figured this out!

You recall the policeman heard shouts of “Frank, Frank, no! Don’t do it!” He runs into the room, sees a dead man, a “smoking gun,” and three people standing around: a minister, a doctor, and a plumber. He immediately arrests the minister. What did he realize that allowed him to know who was the killer?

Here’s the answer: Only the minister could have been named Frank, because the policeman saw that the other two, the plumber and the doctor, were women.

Buy James Hurd’s Wingspread: A Memoir of Faith and Flying.  How childhood (Fundamentalist) faith led to mission bush-piloting in South America—and Barbara. Buy it here:  https://jimhurd.com/home/  (or order it at Barnes and Noble, Amazon, etc.) 

Things that even native speakers don’t know:

See pics here related to Wingspread: Of Faith and Flying: http://www.pinterest.com/hurd1149/wingspread-of-faith-and-flying/

Follow “james hurd” on Facebook, or “@hurdjp” on Twitter

Writers’ Corner

Word of the month: hintergedanken

A philosopher once said of Carl Jung, “There is a nice German word, hintergedanken, which means a thought in the very far, far back of your mind. Jung had a hintergedanken in the back of his mind that showed in the twinkle in his eye.” When we write, we need to plumb the inner depths of our mind and emotions and pull out the treasures.

Signs to get motorists’ attention:

Watch for my upcoming novel: East Into Unbelief (provisional title)

Sean loses his father, his best girlfriend, his life dream of avaition, and finally his faith. How can he be a good atheist, especially when he’s stuck at Torrey Bible Institute? He can’t see it, but grace is coming. . . .

Tip of the month: Worry your protagonist. If they’re worried, your reader will be also. Worry means tension and tension drives your narrative.

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Polygamous Navigation

Driving alone I sometimes get lost, but it’s simpler than when my wife and I travel together. When I know where I’m going, I go there (and only occasionally blow past a turn when I get too absorbed in listening to Public Radio). Like other guys, if I don’t know where I’m going, I never stop to ask for directions. I usually follow Penelope’s instructions, the pleasant British-accented voice on my Waze GPS.

My wife trusts my driving implicitly, but she considers navigation more of a team sport. If Penelope is turned off, our conversation goes something like this:

“Do you know how to get there?”

“No; I’m just going to go to the general area and drive around honking until someone helps us.”

(Eyeroll) “Fine; I’ll just keep quiet, then. . .”

“Sorry.”

Why don’t you turn here?”

“We can turn here if you wish.”

“Will that get us there faster?”

“I dunno. We can turn if you want.”

“Well, you just go the way you want to.”

“OK.”

“This doesn’t look familiar. I’m pretty sure we should have turned back there.”

“We can turn anywhere you want to.”

“No; you just go the way you think best . . .”

“OK.”

But Barbara is still uncertain. “Is it beyond I-35E?”

“Yes.”

“It’s taking a long time. Are you sure we haven’t passed our turn?”

“I think it’s up ahead here.”

“We should stop and ask.”

“I think we’re good.”

“I feel like we should have taken I-35E.”

“Why don’t I just shut my eyes and you can tell me where to go?”

(Irritated frown) “I’ve never been there. I’m just trying to help . . .”

When my wife is with me and I also have Penelope on the GPS, it gets more complicated.

“What did she say, right or left?”

“Right.”

“It sounded like left . . .”

I have plugged my cellphone into the USB port and balanced it in an empty cup holder.

“No; it was ‘right.’ See, there’s a little right arrow here on the display.”

“When I go, I usually go the back roads.”

“Maybe I can program Penelope to go the back roads.”

“No, you just go the way you think will be the fastest. . .”

“OK; I think this way is fastest.”

“Are you sure she’s taking us the right way?”

“I can turn her off and you can just tell me where to turn.”

“I don’t remember where to turn. I hope she knows.”

“I assume so; I haven’t been there before.”

We hit a straight stretch and Penelope goes silent.

“Did we miss a turn?”

“Penelope says we turn in 1.5 miles.”

“Oh, how does that take us?”

“I dunno; Penelope knows; I’m just following her instructions.”

“Are you sure this is right?”

“Penelope seems to think so . . .”

“Maybe we should stop and ask.”

“I think we’re good.”

Now, realizing that her common-sense suggestions are having no effect, she quiets for a while. Then,

“It feels like we’re going back the way we came.”

“I think this is right.”

“I think we should have turned back there.”

“Penelope says to go straight.”

“This doesn’t seem like the way we went last time.”

“Why don’t you just tell me how to go, since you remember from last time.”

“No, you just go the way you want.”

“I am; I’m following Penelope.”

“I hope she knows where she’s going . . .”

“I think she does.”

“I’m not sure . . .”

“I’m not polygamous; I can’t serve two masters. Either you tell me how to go or I’ll follow Penelope.”

“I guess we can just see if she gets us there.”

“Well, Penelope says we’ve arrived.”

Incredulous, she says, “O look! Here we are!”