Hello, Jamie. Here I am over 80 years old and I realized something—you’re not weird! I found this out about you much later. Know that I’m in your corner pulling for you, interested in all your details. Right now, you’re wondering why your nose is too high on your face, how to get rid of freckles, how to get a tan on non-tannable skin. How to grow more muscle. How to stand up to bullies. How to afford the clothes that the Big Men on Campus wear. How to get more than a glance from girls. I know; I’ve been there.

I know it’s easy to think about what’s not going right in your life—few friends, no girlfriends, clumsy at sports, lack of money, too much control from parents. Even questioning your faith. Instead of obsessing about what’s wrong. But I recommend you focus on all you have, all the stuff you’re taking for granted, stuff most people in the world do not have: job opportunities, faith formation and church, health, the privilege of whiteness, a peaceful life, shelter, transportation, plenty of food, education, mentors and friends—you’ve got it all.

Constantly rehearse what God has done for you—how he’s gotten you out of trouble, what he’s given you. Treasure your interest in mission aviation—it will channel so many of your life choices. Remember that God will protect you from the trap of lust.

Embrace the truth that God has a plan for your future. Indeed, you are his beloved. I know—sometimes all you see is that you’re alone and discouraged but God is supporting you, directing your future. I know you think that to get friends you need to be a strong, funny, handsome, interesting person. Only after high school did I learn the truth—people are interested in people who are interested in them. Learn to talk in terms of the other person’s interests, not your own. (Read Dale Carnegie, How to Win Friends and Influence People.) Focusing on others will attract others to you. Actually, people want to talk about themselves. Ask questions and pursue conversations without jumping in with your own problems, your own stories. Don’t interrupt. I’m still working on being a good listener. People like people who will listen.

Your social life will only get better through high school and beyond—you gotta believe it. You will mature a ton and be better able to handle the challenges you will face. You will gain more friends, have more girlfriends. You will find people are becoming truly interested in you.

Are people opposing you? Hey; to be alive is to have conflicts. But when people accuse you or put you down, know that a lot of that comes from their own insecurity. Don’t be defensive. If someone criticizes you, just smile and say, “I’ve got lots of things I’m working on.”

Look around at the adults who believe in you—your pastor, teacher, your parents’ friends, your employer, your school counselor. Let them know you’re thankful for all their interest and advice. Looking back, I am stunned at how many of these people I took for granted and never even thanked.

It’s too late for me, so you ask Grandpa Anderson what it was like building his tarpaper shack on the South Dakota prairie, or ask him how he survived the death of his two young boys (your uncles), Jamie and Calvin. Grandpa and Grandma won’t be around forever, and after they’re gone you’ll long to be able to ask them questions. Ask them now.

After I married and had kids, I realized that having my own teenagers was punishment for the way I treated my parents when I was a teenager! Notice how your parents sacrifice for you—time, money, acts of kindness. Thank them for this. Cherish their love and support for all you do. Don’t take this stuff for granted.

Take time to explore your world. Learn where your water comes from, your electricity. Learn how your neighborhood is laid out. Go on a mission or a service trip. Travel, if you can. You will not have much time for this later.

Think about a part-time job and start saving a little money each month. Get smart on money matters—saving, investing, spending. Don’t buy a bunch of stuff. These things won’t matter when you get older.

Read the Bible each day and pray the Scriptures. Wise Solomon counsels—“Remember now thy creator in the days of thy youth . . .”

Believe it and believe God when he proclaims—“You are not weird!”