All Hallows Eve: A story for October 31

Mary’s three-story, 100-year-old house is obscured by a tall oak with its leafless, witch-finger branches that slash across the full moon and pierce the night sky. The wind is rising and rain threatens. On this cold autumn night, smoke pours from the chimney, but no light escapes the shuttered windows. The passing years have flaked off big patches of paint from the porch rails.

We and our three preschool children live next door, but we don’t know Mary well. I do know she loves reading dark stories, and I’ve come here tonight to loan her my Edgar Alan Poe. Her husband died years ago, and now she and her teenage daughter, Susan, live here alone. Last year, Mary’s other daughter, Linda, died in a brutal auto accident. We were out of state at the time, and when we returned home and searched the old papers, we found the report of the accident, but nothing about Linda’s funeral.

I knock on Mary’s door and wait, feeling guilty that I haven’t visited earlier. She opens the door, peers out at me, and says, “Come in. We haven’t seen you for a while. Oh! I love Poe, especially his horror stories.” Susan peeps over her shoulder—silent, brooding, uncertain.

“I thought you’d like it,” I say. “I guess my favorite story is “The Telltale Heart.”

Mary leads me down a dim hallway to the parlor and says, “I’ll sit here; you take that easy chair over there.” A weak light leaks into the parlor from a dusty chandelier in the adjacent room.

Susan rises to make tea. The window shades are drawn, and dust lies on all the furniture. My chair creaks when I move. A rug smelling of cat urine covers the uneven wooden floor. Books lie helter-skelter around the parlor. When Susan returns with a few stale crackers and tea, we sip silently but don’t converse much. Mary says, “Thank you for coming.” Her voice betrays a sad wistfulness, or a resignation.

After tea, Mary and Susan both disappear into one of the bedrooms. I wonder where they’ve gone. After ten minutes they emerge, half-leading and half-carrying a young woman who I judge to be in her early twenties. I feel a chill and my hands turn clammy—she looks like Linda!

They seat the woman in a recliner opposite me, carefully arranging her full skirt about her knees. I imagine I see her chest rise and fall ever so slightly. Her clothes give her a girlish look—a green sweater and opaque white stockings. Her feet stretch out in front of her with her black flats hanging off her toes. Thin hands lie limp in her lap, revealing red, nail-polished fingers. Her pale face head leans back against the top of her chair with glazed eyelids falling open, seemingly staring at the lights of the chandelier. Then I see the dark purple scar that runs from beside her nose around to the back of her head, naturally parting her disheveled brown hair.

Mary says to me, “She loves the recliner. She needs a little help getting to and from the bedroom, don’t you Linda?” I imagine I see Linda’s glazed eyes flicker. Susan says nothing. In fact, she hardly talks throughout my whole visit.

In contrast, I have the impression that Linda is interjecting murmured comments now and again, although I can’t distinguish any words. She seems to be making gentle demands—not mean, but insistent. What does she want?

I wonder, Why do they care for her here? Does Linda have her sister and mother under her powers? What powers? Is she somehow hindering them from releasing her? She hardly speaks, but the two women seem dedicated to her, and even fearful. Mary leans anxiously toward her.

I feel weak, and cannot comprehend Mary’s burden—the daily care for Linda, and the pain of having to watch her wide-eyed Susan, perpetually fearful, moody, and mournful. I’m suddenly seized by compassion, and suggest, “Why don’t Barbara and I take Linda in for a few days to give you a break? We’re right next door.”

Mary glances at Linda and says, “Oh, I don’t know how she would like that. We see her and talk to her every day.”

“Oh, that’s OK. We have an empty bedroom. And you can come over each day to visit.”

Finally, Mary reluctantly agrees. “Linda really doesn’t require much care—she sleeps in her clothes. She likes sitting in the living room during the day and retiring early, and she doesn’t mind company. But, how will we get her over to your house? She can hardly walk.”

“No problem—I’ll carry her.”

I walk over to the chair and hoist Linda in my arms, feeling her cold body. She’s lost a lot of weight since I saw her a year ago. When her wounded head falls back, I stare into her wan face with its pale, pink-lipped mouth partly open, as if she’s trying to breathe through her nose.

I say goodbye and leave the house. Mary and Susan watch us from the porch as I carry her down the uneven steps. I’m thinking, I haven’t even told Barbara about this! I wonder if she’ll mind? And what evil, what violence, am I bringing into our home with our small children? As I walk, I try to watch for cracks in the uneven sidewalk. A cold rain has started to fall that obscures the moon and dampens Linda’s face. Little rivulets fall off her sodden hair, drip off her nose and the corners of her gaping mouth, and run down my arm. When I reach out house and climb up the steep cement steps onto our wooden porch, I see the lighted jack-o-lantern the kids carved this week.

I give a violent start, as if waking from a dream. I sit up in my bed sodden with sweat I look around, bewildered. Linda has somehow disappeared!

And then with a shock I realize—tonight is All Hallows Eve!

WINGSPREAD E-Zine for September, 2015


“Spreading your wings” in a complex world

Contents

  • E-zine subscription information
  • How to purchase Wingspread: Of Faith and Flying
  • Newest blog article: Longing for Life
  • Writer’s Corner
  • Book and Film reviews
  • Favorite quotes

 

Subscribe free to this E-zine

Click here http://jimhurd.com to subscribe to Wingspread  E-magazine sent direct to your email inbox, every month. You will receive a free article for subscribing. Please share this URL with interested friends, “like” it on Facebook, retweet on Twitter, etc.

 

Buy—Wingspread: A Memoir of Faith and Flying.

Stories about how my childhood (Fundamentalist) faith led to mission bush-piloting in South America. Buy it here:  jimhurd.com (or at Barnes and Noble, Amazon.com, etc.)
See pics related to Wingspread: http://www.pinterest.com/hurd1149/wingspread-of-faith-and-flying/

 

New blog:   Longing for Life

Daily joys make life complete
But unlived joys oft’ seem more sweet.

‘Tis not the pilots lust the sky
But groundlings who may never fly.

The healthy take each day for granted;
The dying count each day as blessèd.

Gluttons scorn their daily bread;
The starving judge one dry crust good.

Wives live bored in nuptial bliss,
Single souls seek just one kiss….

 Read more here:  http://wp.me/p5hvfJ-6N

(*Request: Please leave a comment on the website after reading this article. Thanks.)

 

Writer’s Corner
Writer’s Word for the Week:  Psychic Distance

Where does the narrator stand relative to the character?  How far does the narrator take the reader inside the character’s head? For instance, the narrator can zoom out for a panoramic view and then zoom in for an up-close, detailed description.  The narrator can describe as an objective outsider, or as an emotionally-engaged insider. Track how you use psychic distance in your writing!

 

Books and Film reviews

Stephen Hawking and the Theory of Everything. 2014. A dramatic film about the life and loves of Stephen Hawking, astrophysicist. Hawking, now a 72-year-old quadriplegic, advanced human knowledge about the universe’s beginnings, but has not found faith in God. Heavy on the love life, and light on the physics and cosmology. ***

Becoming the Gospel: Paul, Participation, and Mission. Michael Gorman. Eerdmans. 2015. Wonkish, with occasional Greek words. But a powerful, holistic reading of St. Paul’s letters to the churches, where Paul sees the new, local churches in Asia and Europe as Christ’s guerrilla-movement for bringing in shalom, and indeed, the Kingdom of God. ***

 

Favorite quotes

♫   A member of Parliament to Disraeli: “Sir, you will either die on the gallows or of some unspeakable disease!”
“That depends, Sir,” said Disraeli, “on whether I embrace your policies or your mistress.”

♫  “I have never killed a man, but I have read many obituaries with great pleasure.”  Clarence Darrow

♫  “There’s nothing wrong with you that reincarnation won’t cure.” Jack E. Leonard

♫  “God is to our generation what sex was to the Victorians.” Malcolm Muggeridge

♫  “The Church is a whore, but she’s our mother.”  Philip Berrigan

*                                  *                                  *                                  *

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Longing for Life

Daily joys make life complete
But unlived joys oft’ seem more sweet.

‘Tis not the pilots lust the sky
But groundlings who may never fly.

The healthy take each day for granted;
The dying count each day as blessèd.

Gluttons scorn their daily bread;
The starving judge one dry crust good.

Wives live bored in nuptial bliss,
Single souls seek just one kiss.

The wealthy may ignore their gold;
The poor give thanks one coin to hold.

‘Tis not the young long for the dawn,
But crones whose lives are almost gone.

Our fulfilled dreams we soon ignore,
But unfulfilled, we quest them more.

God—help us seize each passing hour
And worship Thee with all our power.

Teach us to treasure all our days,
And fill our hearts with constant praise.

James P Hurd

WINGSPREAD E-zine for August, 2015

“Spreading your wings” in a complex world
James Hurd               August, 2015

Contents
1. E-zine subscription information
2. How to purchase Wingspread: Of Faith and Flying
3. Newest blog article:
4. Writer’s Corner
5. Book and Film reviews
6. Favorite quotes
 

Subscribe free to this E-zine   Click here http://jimhurd.com to subscribe to Wingspread  E-magazine sent direct to your email inbox, every month. You will receive a free article for subscribing. Please share this URL with interested friends, “like” it on Facebook, retweet on Twitter, etc.

 

Buy—Wingspread: A Memoir of Faith and Flying  Stories about how my childhood (Fundamentalist) faith led to mission bush-piloting in South America. Buy it here:  jimhurd.com  (or, at Barnes and Noble, Amazon.com, etc.)
See pics related to Wingspread: http://www.pinterest.com/hurd1149/wingspread-of-faith-and-flying/

 

New blog article:   Fear GPS Betty!  

I’m a bad navigator—missing exits, choosing the wrong route, getting turned around. For years I’ve had a recurring dream where I’m driving around lost in a foreign city. I’m apprehensive, late for my appointment, and clothed only in my underwear. Too proud to stop and ask directions, or even consult a map….
Read more here:  http://wp.me/p5hvfJ-6z

(*Request: Please leave a comment on the website after reading this article. Thanks.)

 

Writer’s Corner
Writer’s Word of the Week:  compression. If you wish to write about one decade of your life, compress it. List a few significant events, but pick out just three highlights and expand on them, instead of droning on about everything.

Iowa Summer Writing Festival. My weekend at the University of Iowa was like drinking from a firehose. Powerful suggestions for “telling your tale.” The challenge now is to apply them, practice them, integrate them into my own writing. Pricey, but very valuable. (They provided coffee the first day, but meals and lodging are on your own.) http://www.iowasummerwritingfestival.org/

 

Books and Film reviews
Leo Tolstoy’s Resurrection. Just finished this book. A powerful tale of seduction, waywardness, and the long road to redemption, set in late 1800’s Russia. A wealthy prince seduces a poor housemaid, driving her into prostitution. He later accompanies her to exile in Siberia, trying to atone for his sins. Great descriptions of scenes and characters. I frequently put a “W” (“writing”) in the book margins where I see ideas for my own writing. He takes an “omniscient” view, revealing to the reader the thoughts and intents of the hearts of his characters. Motivations.

Remains of the Day (based on the novel by Kazuo Ishiguro, 1989). I recommend this film of blind, misguided loyalty and lost love. Set in 1930’s England in the mansion of wealthy Lord Darlington. His Butler, Stevens, is 100% loyal to Darlington, in spite of Darlington’s Nazi sympathies. Miss Kenton, the housekeeper, loves Stevens, but Stevens is oblivious, and does not return her love. Years later, he encounters Kenton in a poignant conversation.

 

Favorite quotes

♫   Education is what someone does to you. Learning is what you do for yourself.

♫  You’ve got to be very careful if you don’t know where you are going, because you might not ever get there.
Yogi Berra

♫  God gave you two ends: One to sit on and one to think with. Success depends upon which one you use most —

Heads you win
Tails you lose!

Anonymous

*                                  *                                  *                                  *

Follow “james hurd” on Facebook, or “@hurdjp” on Twitter

If you wish to unsubscribe from this Wingspread E-zine, send a note to hurd@usfamily.net and say in the subject line: “unsubscribe.” (I won’t feel bad, promise!) Thanks.

Fear GPS Betty!

I’m a bad navigator—missing exits, choosing the wrong route, getting turned around. For years I’ve had a recurring dream where I’m driving around lost in a foreign city. I’m apprehensive, late for my appointment, and clothed only in my underwear. Too proud to stop and ask directions, or even consult a map.

So Barbara got me a GPS for our anniversary. It comes with a tiny “How to Get Started” pamphlet (in four languages), with helpful information such as: “Don’t blame us if you’re distracted and kill yourself in a crash… If the battery explodes and your car catches fire, we don’t want to know about it… It’s not our fault if you get lost…,”etc.

The pamphlet barely mentions how to operate the device, so I plug it into my car’s cigarette lighter, turn it on, and finally figure out how to punch in “350 Nelson Ave., Stillwater, MN.”

While I’m still in the garage, the GPS voice (I call her “Betty”) starts telling me where to go and what to do—“Drive to highlighted route.” I visualize Betty sitting sullenly somewhere in a darkened room, staring at a computer screen. Omniscient, she knows all the roads in North America, and even knows about construction work, detours, and rush-hour traffic. I wonder if she can see and hear me, or if she even cares. She intimidates.

I’ve always considered my wife a sufficient navigation aid (e.g., when she scolds, “you missed your turn!”). Now I have Betty. Barbara wonders if I’ll ever need to use my brain again.

I think Betty’s kind of a control freak. After we turn onto I-35W, she instructs me to “Go five miles to Highway 36; then turn left.” I wonder what route she’s taking me; I want to go a different way. I’m hesitant to contradict her, but I cautiously turn left onto 85th Avenue, thinking maybe she won’t notice.

I’m expecting her to say, “Well do what you like, but you’ll be sorry…” or, “I’ll deal with your wrong turns but I’m not happy about it…” She says none of these things, and merely keeps suggesting that I turn south to Highway 36. I ignore her.

Finally she gives up and says, “Go ten miles, then turn right.” Clearly, she’s given up on Highway 36, but I can tell she’s not happy. Betty says nothing for the next ten miles. I wonder, what is she thinking? Next time she speaks, her voice sounds different—curt, edgy, a bit passive-aggressive. I think she’s offended. I’d like to tell her that I’m not mad at her, ask her about her husband and kids, or ask how her day’s going.

When we reach Stillwater, Betty flawlessly guides us to the Thai Basil restaurant (“You have now arrived at your destination”), and after dinner we drive on our own to Nelson’s Ice Cream Shop. She doesn’t seem to mind.

Driving home from Stillwater I don’t detect any resentment—Betty acts as if all is forgiven. But when we turn in at our driveway Betty says we still have four-tenths of a mile to go. Is this retaliation? No. I remember that when I typed in our street name, I’d left out “West.” Betty was thinking we wanted to go “East.” Not your fault, girl.

I wonder how much more I would have to pay to get a friendly male GPS voice—“Is everything OK?… You’re going great… Beautiful day… You might want to turn left here, but I can work with you if you don’t …” My kind of laid-back guy.

Then, after I gained more confidence, I could buy a trash-talking guy: “Why do ya wanna go there? Work with me here—are ya gonna do what I tell ya?… You idiot! I told you to turn right!… Dude, I can tell you’re confused… OK, I’m shuttin’ down—just drive where you want, but it ain’t gonna be pretty… I don’t care if you get yourself lost!… Come back when you’re ready to listen…” At least I would know where I stood.

I’m still not completely comfortable with Betty but I think we’re achieved a good working relationship. She’ll tolerate a few wrong turns if I follow most of her suggestions and, most importantly, she’ll tolerate me if only I don’t talk back.

WINGSPREAD E-Zine for July, 2015


Spreading your wings in a complex world

Contents
1. E-zine subscription information
2. How to purchase Wingspread: Of Faith and Flying
3. Newest blog article: In Search of Pocahontas
4. Writer’s Corner
5. Favorite quotes

 

Subscribe to this E-zine   Click here http://jimhurd.com to subscribe to Wingspread  E-magazine (free), sent direct to your email inbox, about twice a month. You will receive a free article for subscribing. Please share this URL with interested friends, “like” it on Facebook, retweet on Twitter, etc.

 

Buy Wingspread: A Memoir of Faith and Flying  Stories about how childhood (Fundamentalist) faith led to mission bush-piloting in South America. Buy it here:  jimhurd.com (or at Barnes and Noble, Amazon.com, etc.)
See pics related to Wingspread: http://www.pinterest.com/hurd1149/wingspread-of-faith-and-flying/

 

New blog article: In Search of Pocahontas

We just saw the church where Pocahontas got married . . . We see the excavated rectangle that dominates the site—the original church, discovered only a month ago . . .

Read more here:  http://wp.me/p5hvfJ-6k

(*Request: Please leave a comment on the website after reading this article. Thanks.)

 

Writer’s Corner

Writer’s Word of the Week:  one-inch picture window. Find the centerpiece of the most powerful anecdote, event, person, place, and tell your whole story through the lens of that single one-inch picture window.

Iowa Summer Writing Festival. Do you wish to get more serious about your writing, meet other writers, and learn from some of the best? Meet me at the Iowa Summer Writing Festival. Workshops are a single weekend, or up to two weeks. Check it out at: http://www.iowasummerwritingfestival.org/

 

Favorite quotes:

♫   When you love someone, you love the person as they are, and not as you’d like them to be.”
― Leo Tolstoy

♫  Thank you for sending me a copy of your book—I’ll waste no time reading it.
—Moses Hadas

♫  If only there were evil people somewhere insidiously committing evil
deeds and it were necessary only to separate them from the rest of us and
destroy them. But the line dividing good and evil cuts through the heart of
every human being. And who is willing to destroy a piece of his own heart?
—Solzhenitsyn

*                                  *                                  *                                  *

Follow “james hurd” on Facebook, or “@hurdjp” on Twitter

If you wish to unsubscribe from this Wingspread E-zine, send a note to hurd@usfamily.net and say in the subject line: “unsubscribe.” (I won’t feel bad, promise!) Thanks.

In Search of Pocahontas

Hear my prayer, O Lord, and give ear to my cry; hold not Your peace at my tears! For I am Your passing guest, a temporary resident, as all my fathers were.        —Psalm 39:12 AMP

We just saw the church where Pocahontas got married.

It’s August, 2010, and Barbara has agreed to go with me to explore the “historic triangle”—Williamsburg, Yorktown, and Jamestown. Today, feeling the breeze blowing in from the James River, we shun the reconstructed “Jamestown” and pilgrimage straight to the original island site, keen to learn how the great American experiment started. At first we see nothing but a statue of Captain John Smith and a few reconstructed fenceposts. Barbara and I walk over the rough ground toward the excavations and wonder about the tales told by broken pottery and bone fragments. The whole disappeared community is now hidden in the entrails of the earth.

We go inside a derelict tower and gaze up at the crumbling brick that seems to gaze back at us—miraculously, the tower refuses to topple.

Bill, the archaeologist, walks up carrying a clipboard and wearing a floppy hat that shades a few days’ beard growth. (Think Harrison Ford in Raiders of the Lost Ark.) He tells us, “You’re standing in the tower of the third church of the colony, built about 1670.”

He walks us over to a long-abandoned well. “What did you find here?” I ask him.

“They found a signet ring, clay pipe stems, a pistol, a full suit of armor, and what we consider the most important find of all—a child’s school slate with pictures and writings.” I marvel at how a long-disappeared community can come to life through archaeology.

In 1607, England’s Virginia Company hurled her wandering children upon this very beach to manure New World soil. What a tale this island tells! Bill says, “People assumed the original fort had long ago washed into the James River, but in 1994, Dr. Kelso found 90 percent of the original fence postholes.” We rub our hands over the new locust posts planted in the old holes that mark off the triangular fort.

I remember learning in junior high school that Jamestowne was the first permanent English settlement in the New World. Reverend Hunt and John Smith shepherded a hundred or so males that came over that spring, who soon began cultivating tobacco and peanuts for the palates of England. A few years later, the sponsoring Virginia Company imported ninety wives for the men. Assuming that seventeenth-century women were just as interesting as today’s, they probably had little trouble finding husbands. But today we learn that Jamestowne colony almost died stillborn.

In the first two months, Reverend Hunt, bereft of outside aid and hobbled by inadequate food and tainted water, buried two-thirds of these men—inside the fort so the Indians would not notice that they were falling like flies. We see small steel crosses marking thirty-four of these graves, all unexcavated. They buried only the landed gentlemen in coffins—the others lay in shrouds, or just in their clothes. We read the plaque at the base of a memorial cross: “To the glory of God and in grateful memory of those early settlers . . . who died at Jamestown during the first perilous years of the colony.” The plaque doesn’t mention the many Indian deaths. I mourn the adventurers who risked all they had, and died premature deaths. And I mourn the Indian deaths.

We see the excavated rectangle that dominates the site—the original church, discovered only a month ago! We watch the student volunteers from the University of Virginia filtering each shovelful of dirt through a sieve, searching for tiny beads, bone fragments, or seashells. Bill says, “Most of what we know about Jamestown was discovered in the last fifteen years. The yellow flags over there mark the postholes of the church. John Rolfe married Pocahontas here.”

I see several little yellow flags, and I ask Bill, “What are those dark outlines over there in the chancel area?”

“Those are unexcavated graves. Reverend Hunt, the first minister, is probably buried there.”

Along with the settlers, the good ship Godspeed carried other cargo—human greed and raw ambition. Soon the colonists were not only dying but also shooting the Indians and each other. A museum stands on pylons above fifty other gravesites in an ancient burial ground. In the museum we stare at the skeleton of a young English boy with a musket ball embedded in his right knee. We wander around the grounds, looking at the ruined remains of the old plantation buildings. We inspect the foundations of the burned buildings where Nathaniel Bacon (of the botched “Bacon’s Rebellion”) brought a jackbooted gang in and burned the town to the ground. In 1699, the capital of the new Virginia colony moved to Williamsburg, and Jamestown declined.

These first settlers established their beachhead here, holding on for dear life. They weren’t seeking “freedom” so much as wealth and commerce. But many found only broken dreams, frustrated hopes, and shortened lives. As we leave the island, I wonder what new things we will learn about Jamestown in the next fifteen years. We mull over these artifacts, these graves. I gain an insight—almost everybody who is born, dies. I guess I had always assumed that in my case there might possibly be an exception. I find here a story of fecund hopes, most of which were dashed by sadness and loss.

Barbara asks me, “Well, what do you think?

I reply, “Jamestown tells me that most of my endeavors are futile, and that I must pursue things that are not transient, but transcendent.”

WINGSPREAD E-zine for June, 2015

“Spreading your wings” in a complex world.

Contents

1. E-zine subscription information
2. How to purchase Wingspread: Of Faith and Flying
3. Newest blog article: “Praying in a ruined cathedral”
4. Writer’s Corner
5. Favorite quotes

 Subscribe to this E-zine   Click here http://jimhurd.com to subscribe to Wingspread  E-magazine (free), sent direct to your email inbox, about twice a month. You will receive a free article for subscribing. Please share this URL with interested friends, “like” it on Facebook, retweet on Twitter, etc.

 Buy Wingspread: A Memoir of Faith and Flying How childhood (Fundamentalist) faith led to mission bush-piloting in South America. Buy it here:  jimhurd.com (or at Barnes and Noble, Amazon.com, etc.)  See pics related to Wingspread: http://www.pinterest.com/hurd1149/wingspread-of-faith-and-flying/


New blog article:
Praying in a ruined cathedral  

We pilgrim along the forested path. I smell the peonies and primroses that border the trail. Crosses populate a little cemetery on one side of the path, their planted stones listing but not toppling, marking the graves of the holy ones. I finger the rough limestone, trying to trace the faded names.

Up ahead, a ruined cathedral emerges through the trees—a huge, wounded hulk. We walk across a clearing and into the roofless nave, now open to the sky, where the warm wind disorganizes my hair….

Read more here:  https://wordpress.com/post/78053395/361

(*Request: Please leave a comment on the website after reading this article. Thanks.)


Writer’s Corner

Wondering how to solve layout problems for your article or book? Read my “On Writing: Layout” athttps://wordpress.com/post/78053395/354

 Writer’s Word of the Week:  Pseudonym

Definition: A substitute-name for a person or place

Think very carefully about who may object, or who may be damaged, by what you write. How can you avoid criticism, or betrayal of others, especially friends or members of your own family? You can use pseudonyms for people or places. Keep a separate ID list so you can keep track of who’s who.

However, sometimes even pseudonyms are not enough—think Sinclair Lewis’ novel Main Street, where the good people of Sauk Centre were outraged at what he wrote about their town. You may need to mask places or events so as to protect identities. You may need to ask people’ permission. Or some things you may need to omit.

Writer’s workshop! Do you wish to get more serious about your writing, meet other writers, and learn from some of the best? Meet me at the Iowa Summer Writing Festival. Workshops from weekends to week-long. Check out their website at: http://www.iowasummerwritingfestival.org/

Favorite quotes:

♫   A good question is never answered. It is not a bolt to be tightened into place but a seed to be planted and to bear more seed toward the hope of greening the landscape of ideas.            John Ciardi

♫  God gave you two ends: One to sit on and one to think with. Success depends upon which one you use most —

Heads you win
Tails you lose!
Anonymous

♫  I’ve always wanted to be somebody, but now I see I should have been more specific.
Lily Tomlin

♫  A doctor can bury his mistakes but an architect can only advise his clients to plant vines.               Frank Lloyd Wright

♫  You’ve got to be very careful if you don’t know where you are going, because you might not get there.      Yogi Berra

♫  To pray only when we feel like it is more to seek consolation than to risk conversion.
Joan Chittister

*                                  *                                  *                                  *

Follow “james hurd” on Facebook, or “@hurdjp” on Twitter

If you wish to unsubscribe from this Wingspread E-zine, send a note to hurd@usfamily.net and say in the subject line: “unsubscribe.” (I won’t feel bad, promise!) Thanks.

Praying in a ruined cathedral, near York

We pilgrim along the forested path. I smell the peonies and primroses that border the trail. Crosses populate a little cemetery on one side of the path, their planted stones listing but not toppling, mark the graves of the holy ones. I finger the rough limestone, trying to trace the faded names.

Up ahead, a ruined cathedral emerges through the trees—a huge, wounded hulk. We walk across a clearing and into the roofless nave, now open to the sky, where a brisk wind disorganizes my hair. I look above the bare columns, up to where the flying buttresses still support the clerestory walls, and see the sun pouring through their pane-less, sightless windows. Below, the fragrance of mown grass fills all the space where stood the pews. In the apse, birds walk and peck among the weeds that grow atop the abandoned altar. All else is silent.

Long ago, workmen sweat blood building these piles—impelled by hunger, or the need to gain church absolution through penance-work. Later, ignorant armies spilled blood grappling in the night, and then the winners torched these towers, burnt the roof, and besmirched the stones.

Time floods over this place, but, like battered antique furniture, it stands timeless, and still testifies to the ancient faith, the ancient ways. People worshiped and died here, and now lie in the nearby plot awaiting resurrection. How many Christmases and Easters were celebrated here? How many hymns sung? How many prayers lifted, sins confessed, and Eucharists chanted? We kneel and pray on the hallowed grass.

Today, heedless grass-muffled feet tread here. Careless hands caress the ruined columns, unmindful of those who built these halls, tilled this garden, dug these graves. I see a father with two children running beside him.

“What mean these stones?” they ask.

The father replies, “They remind us that Godly men performed great deeds here—deeds that still touch us today.”

This place demands nothing of me, calls me to no task, and only asks that I stop here, and reflect. The stones whisper, “Traveler—go slowly here. Reflect on these crumbling walls, walk the grass-grounded halls while you consider your short, anxious life. Is it not as a vapor? Who will care? Who will remember you? Live well, for one day you too will be missing from the earth.”

So many places we tread and heed not the dead beneath our feet—their labors and longings, aspirations and desperations, losses and lamentations. God has given us these places, spaces which time cannot erase. Dare I fail to pause and ponder the power of the past? I am found here on holy ground, wondering at the mystery, straining to see the disappeared faces. I feel as if I am a fragile, transient thing, who today haunts these eternal halls. As I stop to pray and worship, I can feel all the past leaning into my present.

Reluctantly, we chastened pilgrims turn to continue our journey. It is good to have been here.