Spreading your wings in a perplexing world
September, 2024 James P. Hurd
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Contents
- Writer’s Corner
- Blessed Unbeliever
- This month’s story
- This month’s puzzler
- WINGSPREAD Ezine subscription information
- Wisdom
Writer’s Corner
Tip for writers: Ideally, the first paragraph of your story should do the following: 1. Introduce the main character(s), characters whom readers are willing to invest time getting to know, strong characters. 2. Give some idea of the world of the story: location, time period. 3. Hint at the main conflict or challenge. 4. Establish the tone of the story. 5. Fill the first paragraph with not only narrative or description; fill it with action.
Favorite metaphors: cow-flecked hills, moon with upturned horns, poster child for the human condition.
Book of the month: Isaac Azimov’s Foundation Series, 1950s. At some time in the distant future ships traveling faster than light ply the starry field of our Milky Way, knitting together several billion solar systems and quintillions of people The First Empire is destroyed and now it’s up to Hari Sheldon and the Foundation to construct a new empire. Nuclear blasters, mind control, a dangerous mutant—all this and more in a cosmic drama that unfolds across several millennia and the vast reaches of the galaxy.
BLESSED UNBELIEVER novel

Blessed Unbeliever (paper or Kindle version) can be found at Wipf and Stock Publishers, Amazon https://a.co/d/9su5F3o or wherever good books are sold.
New Story: The World of Center Street Elementary
September, 1946. Mother took my hand as we walked the dirt along Mr. Wheeler’s avocado orchard, turned to walk the three blocks of Culver Street, then crossed the playground toward Center Street school. I raised my eyes to view the enormous three-story wooden cube with its green-shingled hip roof and windows that stared out with unblinking eyes. I was excited about the classroom work but worried about meeting new kids. Mother pointed to a cave-like opening under the entrance stairs. “That’s the boys’ bathroom. The girls’ is on the other side; never go in there.” She said goodbye as I climbed the wooden steps to where Mrs. Brennan extended her carefully-tended white hand. She wore her greying hair up in a bun and her blue dress reached to her calves. I glanced behind me to see my mother disappearing across the playground. . . To read more, click here.
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This month’s puzzler (thanks to Car Talk archives)
An 11-year-old boy is standing at a bus stop in a very small town waiting for the #12 bus and holding his just-purchased fishing pole.
The bus finally arrives, but as the little boy begins to step up onto the bus, the bus driver stops him.
“You can’t get on here with that fishing rod,” the bus driver says.
“Why not?” the little boy asks.
“There’s a new city ordinance that prohibits anything—packages, bags or anything at all—being carried on the bus that’s longer than four feet. And that fishing rod is longer than four feet. I’m sorry.”
“Well, how am I supposed to get home?” the little boy asks.
“That’s your problem, kid. That fishing rod is five feet long, so you can’t ride the bus.Sorry,” says the bus driver.
So, the kid figures he will have to return the fishing rod, get his money back, so he can get home on the bus. He goes to the store, and the clerk tells him, “No refunds. Sorry kid. You’re stuck with it.”
So he’s stuck with the fishing rod and no way to get home because he can’t take a cab because it’s too expensive.
He walks back into the store again, realizing he can’t return it. He stands thinking for a second.
Five minutes later, he’s on the bus legally, riding home with the fishing rod, without altering it, breaking it, sawing it in half, or collapsing it.
He does nothing whatsoever to alter the fishing rod.
How does he do it?
(Answer will appear in next month’s WINGSPREAD newsletter.)
Answer to last month’s puzzler:
You recall Julie’s dad had five daughters: June, July, August and September. What was the fifth daughter’s name? The fifth daughter? Julie! (Please don’t unsubscribe; the puzzler will be harder next time.)

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Wisdom
Disappeared words
Well, I hope you are Hunky Dory when you read this and chuckle. Here are some old expressions that have become obsolete because of the inexorable march of technology. These phrases included: Don’t touch that dial; Carbon copy; You sound like a broken record; and Hung out to dry.
Eeyoring (being glum, despondent)
Mergatroyd ? Do you remember that word? Would you believe the spell-checker did not recognize the word? “Heavens to Mergatroyd!”
The other day a not so elderly (I say 75) lady said something to her son about driving a Jalopy; and he looked at her quizzically and said, “What the heck is a Jalopy?” He had never heard of the word “jalopy!” She knew she was old . . . but not that old.
Back in the olden days we had a lot of moxie . We’d put on our best bib and tucker, to straighten up and fly right.
Heavens to Betsy!
Gee whillikers!
Jumping Jehoshaphat!
Holy Moley!
We were in like Flynn and living the life of Riley, and even a regular guy couldn’t accuse us of being a knucklehead, a nincompoop or a pill. Not for all the tea in China!
Back in the olden days, life used to be swell, but when’s the last time anything was swell? Swell has gone the way of beehives, pageboys and the D.A.; of spats, knickers, fedoras, poodle skirts, saddle shoes, and pedal pushers.
Oh, my aching back! Kilroy was here, but he isn’t anymore.
We wake up from what surely has been just a short nap, and before we can say, “Well, I’ll be a monkey’s uncle!” Or, “This is a fine kettle of fish!” We discover that the words we grew up with, the words that seemed omnipresent as oxygen, have vanished with scarcely a notice from our tongues and our pens and our keyboards.
Poof, go the words of our youth, the words we’ve left behind. We blink, and they’re gone. Where have all those great phrases gone?
Long gone: Pshaw, The milkman did it. Hey! It’s your nickel. Don’t forget to pull the chain. Knee high to a grasshopper.
Well, Fiddlesticks! Going like sixty. I’ll see you in the funny papers. Don’t take any wooden nickels. Wake up and smell the roses.
It turns out there are more of these lost words and expressions than Carter has liver pills.
This can be disturbing stuff! (Carter’s Little Liver Pills are gone too!)
Leaves us to wonder where Superman will find a phone booth.
See ya later, alligator! Okey Dokey .

From the heart
- Some people are kind, polite, and sweet-spirited
Until you try to sit in their pews. - Many folks want to serve God,
But only as advisers. - The good Lord didn’t create anything without a purpose,
But mosquitoes come close. - Opportunity may knock once,
But temptation bangs on the front door forever. - We’re called to be witnesses, not lawyers or judges.
- I don’t know why some people change churches;
What difference does it make which one you stay home from? - Be ye fishers of men. You catch ’em – He’ll clean ’em.
- Coincidence is when God chooses to remain anonymous.
- God grades on the cross, not the curve.
- He who angers you, controls you!
- What more could we want
than to be a healing presence
in each other’s life?
The prophetic tasks of the church are to tell the truth in a society that lives in illusion, grieve in a society that practices denial, and express hope in a society that lives in despair.
Walter Brueggemann
I will go out and carve a tunnel of hope from a mountain of despair.
Martin Luther King Jr.


