Grey towers of Durham, Yet well I love thy mixed and massive piles, Half church of God, half castle ‘gainst the Scot, And long to roam these venerable aisles, With records stored of deeds long since forgot.
―From Sir Walter Scott, etched on the Prebends Bridge, Durham
Just a small spring, oval-shaped and rimmed with stones. And yet when Rachel’s husband was dying of cancer, they would visit this spring and walk around its rim. Both were self-described agnostics, yet Holystone Spring became for them a sacred place.
Rachel, admin in the Department of Anthropology at Durham University where I was a visiting fellow, suggests to Barbara and me that we take a Saturday ramble to the spring. For her, this little pool provides peace amidst her grief, and she is kind enough to introduce us.
She drives us along winding roads through pasturelands of sheep and cattle bounded by dry stone fences. She points to a cave near a river. “That’s where Cuthbert, a seventh-century Celtic monk, used to live and pray.” We eventually leave the paved road and drive through a cattle gate and across a field to stop near a small wood. This is not a tourist spot―we see no one else. Exiting the car, we walk to a stone fence and open a gate. Walking into the wood, we enter a circle of seven large beech trees and come to a small, oval pool that holds the waters of Holystone Spring. I dip my hand into the cool, clear waters. On the margins grow bright yellow monkeyflowers, watercress and celandine that flourish in this cool shade. A Celtic stone cross rises out of the waters, placed here in Victorian times to honor early Celtic missionaries. On the edge of the spring stands a gray stone statue of Bishop Paulinus that was carved in the fifteenth century. Legends tell of him baptizing thousands of Northumbrians here in this place where Roman cavalrymen used to water their horses.
We circle the spring in silence, enjoying the coolness of the wood, seeing the sun’s sparkle on the still waters, examining the cross and statue, honoring the memory of Rachel’s husband and respecting this place holy to her and to the thousands of pilgrims who have visited over the centuries.
In the early twelfth century Holystone became the home of a priory of Augustinian canonesses. They took charge of the famous spring and christened it “Lady’s Well,” after the Virgin Mary. But in 1541, Henry VIII abolished their monastery (along with many others all over England) and ordered their buildings razed during what became known as the “Dissolution of Monasteries.” All that remains today is an excavated site that reveals the thick, ancient walls.
So can we call Holystone Spring a “sacred site?” It is a place where pilgrims come to meditate, a place of great spiritual importance over the centuries. Ironic that it lies here hidden, a silent witness to the men and women whose lives were changed here forever.
As we depart, I smile, thinking back to my fundamentalist childhood in California. I treasure the Bible knowledge I gained, the orientation toward Christ and the gospel, the moral guidance. And yet we had no holy objects, no “saints,” no pilgrimages, no treasured studies of church history, no sacraments and no sacred places (we used to play chess on the communion table). Fundamentalism was evangelizing and missionizing, Bible- and doctrine-based, accompanied by strict lifestyle prohibitions (no smoking, drinking, dancing or going to movies). I treasure that early formation, but if I had only one day to live, and could choose one place in all the world to visit, I would choose Holystone Spring.
Spreading your wings in a postmodern world April 2026 James P. Hurd
Please forward, and share this zine with others. Thank you.
The world is a strange, beautiful, mysterious and sometimes disappointing place. This zine is dedicated to that mystery.
CONTENTS
Writer’s Corner
Blessed Unbeliever novel
This month’s story
This month’s puzzler:
WINGSPREAD Ezine subscription information
Wisdom
WRITER’S CORNER
Dedicated to the world of words and to the people who love them.
Writer’s tip: If you’re writing fiction or even memoir, remember—if you don’t have conflict, you don’t have a story. Think Downton Abbey. There’s always a problem—shunned love, dangerous secrets, great loss, unwelcome change, upstairs/downstairs troubles, money problems, legal problems. You get the idea—if there’s no conflict, you don’t have a story.
Want to browse archived WINGSPREAD stories? Click under “archives” at https://jimhurd.com/ These stories include memoirs, stories about bush flying, and personal essays. You can typeany keywords in the webpage “search” function.
The act of minimizing the perceived radical aspects of a person or idea in order to make them appear more acceptable to a wider audience. His loyalists constantly sanewashed his comments and actions.
Metaphor of the month:“He was the kind of man that destiny had a serious grudge against.”
Digital resources: Use AI to do background research for your stories and memoirs. E.g., “What were the streets that ran by the old Madison Elementary School?” “What are the trees native to northern California?” “What was the date John F. Kennedy was shot?”
TV series of the month: OUR MUTUAL FRIEND. Based on the eponymous book by Charles Dickens. Greed, treachery, death, young love, charity, secrets, beauty. Follow John Harmon as he conceals his identity and pursues the beautiful yet prideful young Bella. Four longer episodes on the BBC streaming service. (The BBC streaming service is wonderful! Christie’s Piorot, Conan Doyle’s Sherlock Holmes, Chesterton’s Father Brown, Jane Austin’s stories, Shakespeare and many others.)
Task for you: Start a list of metaphors you have heard or read that you love. When you write your next story, glance over your list and see if you can use any of them. Send me your best finds.
BLESSED UNBELIEVER novel
An Excerpt from Blessed Unbeliever
Late one night Sean McIntosh sat alone, gazing out the window of Norbert prayer room, trying hard not to pray. Why am I in a prayer room? he asked himself. I don’t even believe God exists—I’m like a Nazi in a synagogue. He smelled the humid carpet and a chill gripped him—was the radiator working? I guess you don’t ever become a perfect atheist; you just work harder and harder at it. Am I working hard enough? He slammed his fist down on the table. “Damn it—tonight I’ll burn some bridges.”
He walked in stocking feet down the hall to fetch the steel wastebasket from his dorm room along with some towels, a paper bag, a jar of water and a book of matches he’d picked up from a restaurant. And his Bible. Propping a chair under the knob of the closed prayer room door, his hands trembled as he picked the Bible up and opened to the inscription on the flyleaf: “For you, Son, on your twelfth birthday. God bless you. Love, Mom.” This black leather Scofield Bible symbolized his fundamentalist Christian life. But tonight, he was leaving it all behind. Why couldn’t he just throw it away? No, he had to do something more, something to make a clean break with his past.
His heart faltered as he heard footsteps outside, probably someone going to the bathroom. Grasping his Bible by the spine, he struck a match and held it under the hanging pages. When they curled and blazed into flame, he dropped the burning mass into the wastebasket. He stuffed some towels in the crack under the door. Coughing, he ran over and opened the window, hoping no one would smell the smoke. It seemed to him that the acrid smell, along with his childhood faith, was pouring out the window and disappearing into thin air. He felt the loss but at the same time felt empowered by his action.
When the smoke died down, he poured in the jar of water, heard the steam hiss and then sat a long time in one of the wooden chairs trembling. In his desperation he’d done the deed, committed the sacrilege, put into action his atheism—the boldest thing he’d ever done. And he’d done it in this sacred place of prayer. Henceforth his “Christian faith” would only be an act.
He scooped out the sodden mass and put it in the paper bag, trying to wipe the condemning wet ashes from his hands. Opening the prayer room door and looking both ways down the hall, he walked down to the men’s bathroom and stuffed the bag deep into the trash can. Just then he looked up at the mirror and saw a bulky form walk in and enter one of the stalls. Dean Winters! He must be on overnight duty this week. Sean panicked. He quickly washed the stains off his hands, hoping no lingering smoke smell would betray him, hoping Winters wouldn’t notice the soggy, burnt mass in the trash can. Then he crept back to his dorm room, threw himself on his bed exhausted and said out-loud, “I’ll never believe in God again. . . .”
Available in paper or Kindle version at Wipf and Stock Publishers, Amazon https://a.co/d/9su5F3o or order it wherever good books are sold.
NEW STORY: AN AMISH DEATH
White buggy at the Belleville auction
Melinda Yoder, sister to the Amish bishop, has died. Since the church does not practice embalming, she must be buried within twenty-four hours. I have never met Melinda, but I have been living for several months in the home of her nephew, Eli. Today I go to her funeral, accompanied by Shirley Renno, one of her distant Mennonite relatives.
We drive into the barnyard on a bitter cold day to find some snow on the ground and many white buggies parked near Melinda’s farmhouse. The smell of tobacco drifts over from where some older men stand near the barn, rolling cigarettes and smoking. They all wear black hats, long-sleeved pullover shirts and brown pants and coats. Lacking suspender or belt, the pants are snugged with lacing in the back. We walk into the house to see a wooden coffin resting in the middle of the living room on two saw horses. I remove my hat. The Amish are a closed society, but sometimes a funeral draws many English (non-Amish) people. In this case, Shirley and I are the only outsiders. . . .
This story is “The Bridge of Tom and Ray.” Here we go.
In Borneo, there is a bridge connecting two islands constructed of bamboo lashed together with hemp.
It’s been used for hundreds of years, pedestrian traffic, vehicular traffic, both directions. It’s four miles long.
Now this bridge has a weight limit of 20 tons.
One day, a truck filled with pigs pulls up to the bridge. Officials stop him and let him know they have to weigh the truck, due to the weight limit.
So the truck drives onto the scale. Turns out that with all the pigs, and the driver, this truck weighs exactly 20 tons.
The guy at the other end gets the signal and he stops all other traffic. Everyone has to stop.
The bridge is emptied, and this guy is allowed to drive over the bridge alone.
He is right at the limit, at 20 tons, so he has to drive over completely alone.
As he drives across, a sparrow begins to follow alongside, flying in the air along with the truck.
The sparrow begins to hover over the truck, flapping its wings. When he’s a little beyond the halfway point, the sparrow lands on the truck.
What does the driver do at that moment to keep the truck from plunging into the water?
(Answer will appear in next month’s WINGSPREAD newsletter.)
Answer to last month’s puzzler:
Okay, so, what quick adjustment did the mechanic make that enabled Jeffersonville Fire Department to take home the trophy in the race?
Because they were racing counterclockwise around a track, he wanted to make it so that the Jeffersonville truck would be able to negotiate those constant left hand turns easier than the East Norriton truck.
So without using any tools, he simply let a little air out of the left side tires of the Jeffersonville truck.
Because if you have low pressure in one of your tires, your car will tend to pull in that direction.
So since they are going counter clockwise, that means a lot of left turns. And with the tires just a little light on the left side, the truck wants to go in that direction anyway.
And this way, they were able to win their competition.
Not sure that is truly legal, but we are going with it anyway!
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WISDOM
I will go out and carve a tunnel of hope from a mountain of despair. Martin Luther King Jr.
The most incomprehensible thing about the universe is that it is comprehensible. Albert Einstein
We don’t like their sound, and guitar music is on the way out. Decca Recording Co. rejecting the Beatles, 1962
Egotist: a person more interested in himself than in me. Ambrose Bierce (1842-1914)
The nice thing about egotists is that they don’t talk about other people. Lucille S. Harper
Egotism is the anesthetic that dulls the pain of stupidity. Frank Leahy
On the outside, even donkey droppings are shiny. Old Chinese folk saying
Nothing human can be strange to man. Claude Levi-Strauss, anthropologist
Adam and Eve had an ideal marriage. He didn’t have to hear about all the men she could have married, and she didn’t have to hear about the way his mother cooked.
…Out of self to love be led… John Greenleaf Whittier, from “Andrew Rykman’s Prayer”
Spreading your wings in a Perplexing world March 2026 James P. Hurd
Please forward and share this zine with others. Thank you.
The world is a strange, beautiful, mysterious and sometimes disappointing place. This zine is dedicated to that mystery.
Contents
Writer’s Corner
Blessed Unbeliever
This month’s story:
This month’s puzzler:
WINGSPREAD Ezine subscription information
Wisdom
Writer’s Corner
Dedicated to the world of words and the people who write them.
Want to browse archived WINGSPREAD stories? Click under “archives” at https://jimhurd.com/ These stories include memoirs, stories about my fundamentalist childhood, bush flying, personal essays and other topics. You can type keywords in the “search” function.
Digital resources: If you have a question about your writing—character development, plot, paragraphing, grammar, word use—first try querying an AI site such as ChatGPT, Google Gemini or Perplexity. You can even ask, “Critique this story.”
Task for you: If you have something you wish to submit for publication in this WINGSPREAD Zine (a good quote, maxim, meme, humor or a reflection), send it to me for consideration. Hurdjames1941@gmail.com Thank you.
FORTHCOMING BOOK!
Forthcoming―a book of my stories and essays, new and old. Some samples ―”Egg McMuffin Miracle,” “Churched Atheists,” “Gaming Airport Security.” I’ll keep you posted on progress.
BLESSED UNBELIEVER novel
Sean’s serene childhood turns to tortured adolescence as he leaves for college and finds himself telling people he’s an atheist—.at a Bible Institute! What could possibly go wrong?
Available in paper or Kindle version at Wipf and Stock Publishers, Amazon https://a.co/d/9su5F3o or order it wherever good books are sold
New story: “Garage-Saleing Through an F2 Tornado“
Sunday, 11 Sept. 2005 Barbara’s garage-sale weekend has ended, an event to remember, that kicked off with an F2 tornado.
The preparation started months before, with Barbara collecting, sorting, repairing, and labeling. She recruited three neighbors to contribute, thus increasing potential sales. A spirited debate ensued over financing, timing, duration, organizing, advertising and recruiting the required labor. About one month before, the garage’s primary purpose was violated when our car was banished to the street. In its place grew a flea market filled with small appliances, kitchenware, clothing, books, magazines, furniture, boxes of miscellanea and knickknackery (I know―knickknack looks wrong but that’s what the Oxford Dictionary says so I’m stickin’ with it). We begged and borrowed tables to display stuff. We hung a pole across two step-ladders with room for a multitude of hangars for blouses, skirts, pants shorts, shirts and jackets. . . . To read more, click here: https://tinyurl.com/2wxwzp34
Leave a comment on the article, subscribe to the webpage, and share with others. Thanks.
This month’s puzzler, thanks to Car Talk: “The Firetruck Race”
This one is a classic. Here it is.
Many years ago, there was an intense but friendly rivalry between the volunteer fire departments of two nearby towns, Jeffersonville and East Norriton.
Pride was at stake as their rivalry climaxed each year in the Fireman’s Competition at the county fair. So closely matched were the two fire brigades in skill and experience that the preliminary hook and ladder events were virtually a tie, leading up to the final showcase event of the race of firetrucks.
This race would consist of twenty laps done counterclockwise around the quarter-mile dirt track at the fairgrounds.
Both fire brigades drove identical pumpers, scrupulously maintained and adjusted to peak performance. The rules required that they be set to factory configuration, fully loaded and equipped, and the crews identical in total weight to the nearest ounce.
Both drivers were skilled and experienced, wily veterans of the road, so they were very evenly matched in skill.
The Jeffersonville team had come away disappointed four years in a row, having lost the final event by the closest of margins each time, so the stakes were high this year.
Jeffersonville appealed to Gus Wilson, automotive legend from the Model Garage, to provide them with some small competitive advantage. Gus took a look at the high-wheeled pumpers and the dirt track and mused while he knocked the ashes from his pipe.
He then stepped forward, and without tools, without violating the rules, and without even opening the hood of this firetruck, he makes a quick adjustment that enabled Jeffersonville to take home the trophy that year.
What did he do?
Good luck.
(Answer will appear in next month’s WINGSPREAD zine.)
Answer to last month’s puzzler:
So how could the auto racers possibly finish in the same time? Without using any clocks or timepieces of any sort?
The answer is, they used the timing of the windshield wipers!
Using the same amount of wiper strokes means the same amount of time. Very clever indeed.
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Click here https://jimhurd.com/home/ to subscribe to this WINGSPREAD ezine, sent direct to your email inbox, every month. You will receive a free article for subscribing. Please share this URL with interested friends, “like” it on Facebook, retweet on Twitter, etc.
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Wisdom
Obsolete Words
fopdoodle – foolish or insignificant person
beadledom – petty, fussy authority
zounds – exclamation (“God’s wounds!”)
gadzooks – mild oath (“God’s hooks!”)
smock – woman’s undergarment (now mostly archaic in that sense)
flapdoodle – nonsense
truckle-bed – a low bed stored under another
These are classic:
When I was young, I was told that anyone could become President…. I’m beginning to believe it.
—–
When I was young, I prayed that I’d grow up to be somebody. Now I realize I should have been more specific.
—–
I didn’t realize how unsocial I was until there was a pandemic…. And my life didn’t really change all that much.
—–
Don’t wear headphones while vacuuming; I’ve just finished the whole house before realizing the vacuum wasn’t plugged in.
—–
I gave all my dead batteries away today … free of charge.
—–
I just ordered a life alert bracelet. If I ever get a life I’ll be notified immediately
—–
To the guy who invented “zero” … Thanks for nothing.
—–
The Disappointment Club is pleased to announce that the Friday meeting is cancelled.
—–
Self-esteem is the feeling which makes us attribute our failures to bad luck, and our successes to good judgment.
—–
I was looking for that thingy that peels potatoes and carrots. I asked the kids if they’d seen it. Apparently, she left me a week ago.
—–
A woman adopted two dogs and named them Timex and Rolex. Her friend asked her how she came up with the names. She replied, “They’re both watch dogs.”
—–
Doctor; I’m afraid your condition is fairly advanced. Patient; It was in its early stages when I first sat down in your waiting room.
—–
How does my doctor expect me to lose weight, when every medication he prescribes says, “Take with food.”
—–
Me: Doctor, I’ve swallowed a spoon. Doctor: Sit there and don’t stir.
—–
I was walking past a farm and saw a sign that said: “Duck, eggs!”
I thought: “That’s an unnecessary comma.” Then it hit me.
Baby needs a mommy face
Here’s a gem from C.S. Lewis, writing on love:
Being in love is a good thing, but it is not the best thing. There are many things below it, but there are also things above it. You cannot make it the basis of a whole life. It is a noble feeling, but it is still a feeling. Now no feeling can be relied on to last in its full intensity, or even to last at all. Knowledge can last, principles can last, habits can last but feelings come and go. And in fact, whatever people say, the state called ‘being in love’ usually does not last.
If the old fairy-tale ending ‘They lived happily ever after’ is taken to mean ‘They felt for the next fifty years exactly as they felt the day before they were married,’ then it says what probably never was nor ever would be true, and would be highly undesirable if it were. Who could bear to live in that excitement for even five years? What would become of your work, your appetite, your sleep, your friendships? But, of course, ceasing to be ‘in love’ need not mean ceasing to love.
Love in this second sense — love as distinct from ‘being in love’ — is not merely a feeling. It is a deep unity, maintained by the will and deliberately strengthened by habit; reinforced by (in Christian marriages) the grace which both partners ask, and receive, from God. They can have this love for each other even at those moments when they do not like each other; as you love yourself even when you do not like yourself. They can retain this love even when each would easily, if they allowed themselves, be ‘in love’ with someone else. ‘Being in love’ first moved them to promise fidelity: this quieter love enables them to keep the promise. it is on this love that the engine of marriage is run: being in love was the explosion that started it.”
Spreading wings in a perplexing world February, 2026 James P. Hurd
Please forward and share this zine with others. Thank you.
The world is a strange, beautiful, mysterious and sometimes disappointing place. This zine is dedicated to pondering that mystery.
Contents
Writer’s Corner
Blessed Unbeliever novel
This month’s story: “Colombia: A Severe Mercy”
This month’s puzzler: “No Time”
WINGSPREAD zine subscription information
Wisdom
Writer’s Corner
Dedicated to the world of words and the people who create them.
Want to browse archived WINGSPREAD stories? Click here, then click under “archives” at https://jimhurd.com/ These stories include memoirs, stories about bush flying, personal essays and other topics.
“The Returning” (October, 2025—carrying Barbara’s ashes back to Pennsylvania)
NEW BOOK!
Forthcoming―a book of stories and essays, new and old. Some samples―”Egg McMuffin Miracle,” “Churched Atheists,” “Gaming Airport Security.” I’ll keep you posted on the launch date.
Writer’s tip: Scan your piece for “out-of-order” sentences. They may flow better and make more sense if they’re rearranged.
Words
.Sanewashing (v.) Normalizing and rationalizing outrageous, extreme or false behavior by a public figure. “The commentator sanewashed the bizarre speech, arguing, ‘He’s just being honest.’”
Kavanaughing (v.) Getting targeted because of your appearance. Origin: Brett Kavanaugh (SCOTUS) wrote a recent opinion in support of using physical appearance to identify criminals and undocumented people. Example: “Even though he was a U.S. citizen, ICE Kavanaughed him because of his dark skin.”
Digital resources: AI is a curse and a blessing. The creators never tell you what algorithms they use. However, I have found it useful for critiquing pieces I have written. Ask AI, “Critique the following essay.” It will give you several suggestions.
TV series of the month: POLDARK. On Netflix. A British soldier returns to England after the American Revolution and confronts a new life in Cornwall where he runs a copper mine, deals with threats of war with France and negotiates complex relationships with his relatives.
Task for you: If you have something you wish to submit for publication in this WINGSPREAD Zine, send it to me for consideration. (Humor, pithy quotes)
BLESSED UNBELIEVER novel
Sean’s serene childhood turns to tortured adolescence after Reggie steals his girlfriend, Kathleen. He leaves for college, shaken and losing his childhood faith. and finds himself telling people he’s an atheist—.at a Bible Institute! Parts of the novel draw deeply on my own life experiences, but I’m not telling which parts!
Available in paper or Kindle version at Wipf and Stock Publishers, Amazon ( https://a.co/d/9su5F3o ) or order it wherever good books are sold. Hashtags: #blessedunbeliever #christianwriter #babyloss #southerncalifornia #planes #aviation #humanist #pilotlife #religion #travel #aviationgeek #orangecounty #godless #atheism
New story: “Colombia: A Severe Mercy
Except for the burglaries, Land Rover crash, airplane crash, typhoid fever, a murder and getting kicked out of our rental house, bush-flying for MAF in Colombia was great.
Within a few weeks after checkout, I was flying solo into the small bush airstrips located all around Montería. Muleticos had a hill at one end, making it a one-way strip―you could only land to the west and only take off to the east. This day I’d just cleared the boundary fence when two pigs breached the fencing and darted across the runway. Too late to go around. I touched down and stood on the brakes. Bam bam! I tore them both in two with the left wheel, knocking out the left brake. At that point I could keep the airplane straight or brake to a stop, but I couldn’t do both. The plane swerved violently to the right, took out some fenceposts and came to rest after severing a six-inch tree trunk, throwing the airplane down on its left wing. Thankfully no one was hurt. After we traveled several hours by mule and jeep over dirt roads, I arrived home tired, dirty and discouraged. I collapsed into Barbara’s arms―“I crashed the airplane!” . . .
In qualifying for a Trophy Off Road Race, potential drivers and their teammates were told that they had to traverse a course in as close a time as their partners without the use of time pieces like clocks, watches, or anything like that.
For example, the first person of the two-person team would drive the course through the woods, over bridges, through streams and then return to the starting point and give his vehicle to his partner, who would then drive the same course and try to finish it as close to the time of his partner. So if the first partner finished in four minutes and 25 seconds, the other guy would try to duplicate that time.
But how could he do that without the use of any kind of clock or timepiece?
How could he possibly finish in the same time? That’s the question. So the guys that won the race figured out a way to finish in the same time.
How did they do it?
Good luck. (Answer will appear in next month’s WINGSPREADnewsletter.)
Answer to last month’s puzzler:
Find the homophones that are opposites in the following sentences:
1. The model wore a timepiece on her ankle. (war/peace) 2. Who will underwrite the cost of the sarong? (right/wrong) 3. This is a rare Bolivian diamond. (live/die) 4. The customer got a souvenir from the pharmacy. (near/far) 5. Let’s celebrate by throwing a party. (sell/buy) 6. The stoker must reignite the furnace daily. (night/day) 7. Can buffalo experience hypertension? (low/high)
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Click here https://jimhurd.com/home/ to subscribe to this WINGSPREAD zine, sent direct to your email inbox, every month. You will receive a free article for subscribing. Please share this URL with interested friends, “like” it on Facebook, or retweet on Twitter.
If you wish to unsubscribe from this Wingspread Ezine, send an email to hurdjames1941@gmail.com and put in the subject line: “unsubscribe.” (I won’t feel bad, promise!) Thanks.
Wisdom
Medieval Liturgy of the Hours
Monastic life followed a disciplined schedule.
Matins (during the night, at about 2 a.m.); sometimes called Vigil and composed of two or three nocturns
Lauds (at dawn, about 5 a.m., but earlier in summer, later in winter)
In Japan, they have replaced the impersonal and unhelpful Microsoft Error messages with Haiku poetry. Haiku poetry has strict construction rules. Each poem has only three lines, 17 syllables – five syllables in the first line, seven in the second, five in the third.
Haikus are used to communicate a timeless message, often achieving a wistful, yearning, and powerful insight through extreme brevity. What better answer for th impersonal computer? Here are some samples:
Spreading wings in a perplexing world January, 2026 James P. Hurd
Please forward and share this zine with others. Thank you.
Contents
Writer’s Corner
Blessed Unbeliever
This month’s story: “A Strange Day at the Office”
This month’s puzzler
WINGSPREAD Zine subscription information
Wisdom
Writer’s Corner
Dedicated to the world of words and to those people who create them.
NEW BOOK! I have begun assembling a new book gleaned from the last ten years of my blogs, along with new and revised stories about flying, Latin America, growing up fundamentalist, and about religious faith. Updates will be coming.
Want to browse WINGSPREAD stories from the archives? Click here, then click under “archives” at https://jimhurd.com/ These stories include memoirs, stories about bush flying, personal essays and other topics.
Writer’s Tip:. Supercharge your writing with sensual experience. Don’t tell the reader how you character feels. Make your reader feel these emotions. Use sounds (the wind), sights (a flowering meadow), touch (she ran her hand over the plane’s cold aluminum skin), and, often neglected but powerful senses—taste (sweet, salt, sour, bitter) and smell (perfume, smoke, fresh air, decay). These sensual experiences draw the reader into your constructed world.
.On Craft and Quality
“Good writing is rewriting.” – Truman Capote
“Easy reading is da*n hard writing.” – Nathaniel Hawthorne
“Less is more.” – Ludwig Mies van der Rohe (so true in writing)
“The road to hell is paved with adverbs.” – Stephen King (try to eliminate them)
“No surprise for the writer, no surprise for the reader.” – Robert Frost
“If a story is in you, it has to come out.” – William Faulkner
On Discipline and Persistence
“A professional writer is an amateur who didn’t quit.” – Richard Bach
“The water does not flow until the faucet is turned on.” – Louis L’Amour
“Inspiration is for amateurs; the rest of us just show up and get to work.” Chuck Close
“Either write something worth reading or do something worth writing.” Benjamin Franklin
Digital resources: Where publish your blog? I use a WordPress website. Friends of mine use Substack. If you blog on one platform, it is easy to “share” your blog on another.
Word of the month.PRIMARY (v.). To try to eliminate a person from office by opposing them in a primary election. For example, if a Republican U.S. Representative comes from a district that has always been safely red Republican, the only real way to challenge her is to primary her. That is, put money and support into another candidate who wants the Republican nomination and try to beat her in the primaries. Used in a sentence:: “Because the President doesn’t like her, he’ll probably try to primary her in 2026.”
Task for you: If you have an anecdote or quote you wish to submit to publish in WINGSPREAD, send it to me for consideration.
TV series of the month: Shakespeare & Hathaway. The BBC’s funny sleuthing stories about Lu and Frank, private investigators in Stratford-on-Avon. Find them on BritBox―my favorite streaming service. BritBox also has Agatha Christie’s Pirot, Sherlock Holmes, Chesterton’s Father Brown, Jane Austin movies and many others. I love it that my kids add me to their subscriptions, If I hit a paywall I just punch the button and never see a bill. Why is that?
BLESSED UNBELIEVER novel
Sean’s serene childhood turns to tortured adolescence as he leaves for college and finds himself telling people he’s an atheist—.at a Bible Institute!
Available in paper or Kindle version at Wipf and Stock Publishers, Amazon https://a.co/d/9su5F3o or wherever good books are sold.
“A Strange Day at the Office” (a chapter from my Blessed Unbeliever novel)
Then Myra went crazy. Dear, bubbly Myra, not quite obese but pleasantly plump, long dark hair, black eyes, plenty of lipstick, gregarious, and the owner of a loud, sultry voice. She radiated Eau de Toilette and brought fun with her wherever she went.
Marion told Duane, “Put some music on your radio.” When the music started, Myra jumped up on her chair, then onto her desk, revealing high heels and plump legs showing through her sheer hose. She flung her arms above her head, swayed her hips, twirled her short red dress, and sang lustily, her gold bracelets and Star of David earrings swinging in time as Marion and Duane sang and clapped. For Sean, this was a day to remember . . .
This is a phonetic puzzle. I’m going to read you some sentences. Each sentence contains homophones of two opposites. (Ex. People in Albany enunciate well. (all, none)
Note: The homophones may be buried inside words, but they’re always discreet syllables. They always change spelling from their parts in the sentence.
1. The model wore a timepiece on her ankle. 2. Who will underwrite the cost of the sarong? 3. This is a rare Bolivian diamond. 4. The customer got a souvenir from the pharmacy. 5. Let’s celebrate by throwing a party. 6. The stoker must reignite the furnace daily. 7. Can buffalo experience hypertension?
(Answer will appear in next month’s WINGSPREAD newsletter.)
Answer to last month’s puzzler:
What is odd about this paragraph: “This paragraph is odd. What is its oddity? You may not find it at first, but this paragraph is not normal. What is wrong? It’s just a small thing, but an oddity that stands out if you find it, what is it? You must know your days will not go on until you find out what is odd. You will pull your hair out. Your insomnia will push you until your poor brain finally short circuits trying to find an oddity in this paragraph. Good luck.”
The oddity in this paragraph is, there are no E’s in it. Not a single E.
For a time, E was the most popular letter. But that paragraph above does not contain an E.
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Wisdom
Visual: “Inside the Warm Glow,” by Kaoru Yamada.
Be present, O merciful God, and protect us through the hours of this night, so that we who are wearied by the changes and chances of this life may rest in your eternal changelessness; through Jesus Christ our Lord. Amen.—BCP
Loving the unlovable:
“There is someone I love, even though I don’t approve of what he does. There is someone I accept, though some of his thoughts and actions revolt me. There is someone I forgive, though he hurts the people I love the most. That person is me.” Misattributed to C.S. Lewis
Social skills:
“Some cause happiness wherever they go; others, whenever they go.”
—Oscar Wilde
Child discipline in the electronic age:
I caught my son chewing on electrical cords so I had to ground him. He’s doing better currently and now conducting himself properly.
Obsolete Objects & Concepts
fopdoodle – foolish or insignificant person
beadledom – petty, fussy authority
zounds – exclamation (“God’s wounds!”)
gadzooks – mild oath (“God’s hooks!”)
smock – woman’s undergarment (now mostly archaic in that sense)
flapdoodle – nonsense
truckle-bed – a low bed stored under another
Upscale dining
Rapid aging
As they wait for the bus, Mother tells little Phillip to say he’s 4 years old if the driver asks, so he can ride for free.
As they get into the bus, the driver asks Phillip how old he is.
“I am 4 years old,” Phillip replied.
“And when will you be six years old?” asked Perry.
Spreading wings in a perplexing world November/December, 2025 James P. Hurd
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Contents
Writer’s Corner
Blessed Unbeliever
This month’s story: Plumbers and Electricians
This month’s puzzler: Who done it?
WINGSPREAD Ezine subscription information
Wisdom
Writer’s Corner
Dedicated to people who love words. Words are miracles that brand humans as sentient creatures, creative, inventive, exploring. Taste the words as they roll around on your tongue; let them fill you with a sense of wonder.
NEW BOOK! I have begun assembling a new book of stories and essays gleaned from the last ten years of my blogs. Maybe I’ll group these under the sections: Spring, Summer, Autumn and Winter. Spoiler alert: I’m in the “Winter” phase now, and looking back to those other seasons. I’ll keep you posted.
Why it’s important to write
Want to browse archived WINGSPREAD stories? Click here, then click under “archives” https://jimhurd.com/ These stories include memoirs, stories about bush flying, personal essays and other topics. They’re searchable for key words.
Writer’s tip: Transgress. You seize the reader’s interest if you write something unexpected. Examples: “I’ve given up on Jesus.” “Morality is so 19th century.” Of course, your piece will sort out these shocking statements and explain what you mean. But use counterintuitive and contrary statements: contradictions, hyperbole, even forbidden words (used carefully). The object? Transgressing grabs the reader’s attention.
Words and metaphors
“a unicorn of a girl” (unique type)
“he shat his pants” (quite vivid)
haplotype (a sequence of polymorphic genes that tend to be inherited together). This is the way Ancestry.com discovers your ancestry.
Digital resources:
I still own my Strunk and White, Elements of Style, but you can ask AI (Artificial Intelligence) anything. Try typing into your browser: “chatgpt.” For instance: “What’s the difference between insure and ensure?” “When must you use a comma before a conjunction?” or “Please critique the attached story and give me suggestions on how to improve it.” What I do not do is ask AI to write the story for me.
Word of the month.FAIN (obsolescent): Gladly, willingly
Task for you: Write about how joyful you are without saying how joyful you are. (That is, show; don’t tell.)
BLESSED UNBELIEVER novel
Available in paper or Kindle version at Wipf and Stock Publishers, Amazon https://a.co/d/9su5F3o or wherever good books are sold.
Retirement is deceptive. You’re lulled into thinking that things will pretty much go on as they always have. They usually do. But then, life happens.
I’m working in my college office when the phone rings. “Jim, I don’t know what to do. I’m just sitting here on the sofa sewing and three times I’ve felt faint—like I’m about to pass out.”
My mind races. Is this just in Barbara’s head? In the past, I’ve joked with her that I’ve decided on her epitaph: “I told you I was sick!” But what if something’s really going on? She’s never complained about feeling faint before.
“How often is this happening to you?
“About every half hour or so. Oh! I feel like I’m fainting now!”
“Okay—I’m calling 911 and I’ll come home as soon as I can.”
I call 911, run out to my car, and drive home, praying as I go. When people ask me how prayer works, I always have a ready answer: “I don’t know. But the Bible tells us to pray, and Jesus prayed, so I pray.” . . . To read more, click here: https://tinyurl.com/4tshbrbb
Please “rate” the story and “share” it with others. Thanks.
This one is clever. You have to look closely at the following paragraph. You should actually not read it; you should have someone else read it to you to get the full experience. But you can read it if you have to.
Here it is.
“This paragraph is odd. What is its oddity? You may not find it at first, but this paragraph is not normal. What is wrong? It’s just a small thing, but an oddity that stands out. If you find it, what is it? You must know your days will not go on until you find out what is odd. You will pull your hair out. Your insomnia will push you until your poor brain finally short circuits trying to find an oddity in this paragraph. Good luck.”
So what is it?
Remember, you have to examine the paragraph really well.
Good luck.
(Answer will appear in next month’s WINGSPREAD newsletter.)
Answer to last month’s puzzler:
So, a night watchman hears a person scream “No, Frank!” Then a gunshot. He enters the room and sees a minister, a plumber and a doctor. But how does he know that it was the minister that pulled the trigger?
Easy.
The doctor and the plumber are women. So he made the likely guess that none of the women were named Frank.
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Wisdom
Q. How do you keep your car from being stolen? A. Buy a standard shift model
Q. How do you send a message in code? A. Write in cursive
“Critical thinking without hope is cynicism. Hope without critical thinking is naiveté. Maria Popova
Here are some irreverent trivia questions about college football:
What does the average Alabama football player get on his SATs? Drool.
How many Michigan State freshmen football players does it take to change a light bulb? None. That’s a sophomore course.
How did the Auburn football player die from drinking milk? The cow fell on him.
Two Texas A&M football players were walking in the woods. One of them said, ” Look, a dead bird.” The other looked up in the sky and said, “Where?”
What do you say to a Florida State University football player dressed in a three-piece suit? “Will the defendant please rise.”
How can you tell if a Clemson football player has a girlfriend? There’s tobacco juice on both sides of the pickup truck.
What do you get when you put 32 Kentucky cheerleaders in one room? A full set of teeth.
University of Michigan Coach Jim Harbaugh is only going to dress half of his players for the game this week. The other half will have to dress themselves.
How is the Kansas football team like an opossum? They play dead at home and get killed on the road
How do you get a former University of Miami football player off your porch? Pay him for the pizza.
On the Act of Writing:
“The first draft is just telling yourself the story.” – Terry Pratchett
“If you don’t have time to read, you don’t have the time—or the tools—to write.” – Stephen King
“Writing is a way of tasting life twice.” – Anaïs Nin
“Write what you know.” – Mark Twain
“Write the book you want to read.” – Toni Morrison
“Words are our most inexhaustible source of magic.” – J.K. Rowling
“Writing is a dog’s life, but the only life for me.” – Gustave Flaubert
Why some people don’t like Daylight Savings Time
Wisdom and Philosophy
“The only thing we have to fear is fear itself.”—Franklin D. Roosevelt
“Be yourself―everyone else is already taken.”—Oscar Wilde
“The mind is everything. What you think you become.”—Buddha
“The journey of a thousand miles begins with one step.”—Lao Tzu
“In three words I can sum up everything I’ve learned about life: it goes on.” —Robert Frost
“The unexamined life is not worth living.”—Socrates
Spreading wings in a perplexing world September, 2025 James P. Hurd
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Contents
Writer’s Corner
Blessed Unbeliever
This month’s story: “Silver Acres Formed Me”
This month’s puzzler: “Island of Truth and Lies”
WINGSPREAD Zine subscription information
Wisdom
Writer’s Corner
This section betrays my belief that to be a writer is to be a lover of words. Words and human speech―miracles that brand humans as sentient creatures―creative, inventive, exploring. Taste the words as they roll around in your mouth, marvel at them, let them fill you with a sense of wonder.
Writer’s tip: First-person-present tense is gripping, immediate. It’s hard to write in this tense but give it a try. (Example: “I park the car in front, get out and walk up to the door. . .”)
Task for you: Try writing a 100-word paragraph using only the present, first-person tense.
Word of the month:GOBSMACKED (Obsolete) To be a writer is to be a word-lover, including obsolete words. This word comes from Irish and Scottish Gaelic. It still pops up in other places in British slang―for example, “shut your gob!” If you say that you were “gobsmacked” it means that you were so astonished, it was as though someone had smacked you in the mouth (Wikipedia). A phrase with a similar meaning: “Slapped upside the head,”
Book of the month: The biblical book of Ruth. A marvelous story about a foreign refugee woman (Moabite) who travels into Israel, finds a living, finds love and becomes an ancestor of King David and of Jesus. Hear her aching, immortal words to Naomi, her mother-in-law“—Beseech me not to leave thee . . .”
BLESSED UNBELIEVER novel
Sean McIntosh ingested fundamentalism along with his mother’s milk. And yet as he reached his late teens his doubts overwhelmed him and he proclaimed himself an atheist—while attending Torrey Bible Institute! This is his story.
Available in paper or Kindle version at Wipf and Stock Publishers, Amazon https://a.co/d/9su5F3o or wherever good books are sold.
New story: “Silver Acres Formed Me”
When I entered sixth grade, Jim Hayden, who always wore a dark suit, white shirt and tie, taught our Sunday School class. To get to his classroom, us five boys—Gene, Fred, Ron, John and I―had to climb stairs up to a small room under the squat bell tower. This was our first “segregated” SS class and he seized the opportunity to warn us against sexual temptation, enlightening us on the meaning of certain sexual hand signs and counseling us how to behave with girls. Silver Acres was big on teaching the dangers of sex. However, the only temptation I was feeling at the moment was to pull the church bell rope which passed through the classroom from floor to ceiling. Yet I remember the delicious discovery of the second sex at Silver Acres. At that age, girls were attractive, mysterious and untouchable.. . . To read more, click here:https://jimhurd.com/2025/09/02/silver-acres-formed-me/
Leave a comment on the story and share with others. Thanks.
Want to browse archived WINGSPREAD stories? Click here: https://jimhurd.com/ then click in the righthand column under “archives.” These stories include memoirs, stories about bush flying, personal essays and other topics.
This month’s puzzler, ”Island of Truth and Lies,” thanks to Car Talk Archives
This one is a classic. I’ll set the scene.
You’re on Isla Nublar, the island from Jurassic Park. There are dangers around every corner. Pterodactyls are circling overhead. Tyrannosaurus Rex’s are nipping at your heels. The only hope to escape is to get to the dock before the last transport leaves the island.
You’re driving along this road in your Nissan Pathfinder heading for the dock and you come to the proverbial fork in the road. You don’t know which way to go so you try to find someone to ask.
Now, unfortunately, on this island there are only two kinds of people: liars and truth tellers. The liars always lie, and the truth tellers always tell the truth.
So you come to the fork in the road, and there are two guys there. And you know that they always travel in pairs. There’s always one liar and one truth teller. But you don’t know which is which. And you really need to know the way to the dock.
So the puzzler question is, what one question could you ask either one of them that would certainly get you onto the right road and to safety where your boat awaits at the dock?
You only get one question. What would it be?
Good luck.
(Answer will appear in next month’s WINGSPREAD newsletter.)
Answer to last month’s puzzler about the broken stone:
This one was hard!
So what were the weights of the 4 individual pieces after the large stone was broken? Remember, the pieces of the broken stone could now be used to weigh any item, assuming those items were in 1-pound increments from 1 pound to 40 pounds, using the stones and a balance scale.
So how much did each piece weigh? And the hint that I gave was, how would you weigh 2 pounds?
Here is the answer:
One of the pieces has to be 1 pound. And if you use the hint I gave, then the next one has to be 3 pounds. Because if you put 1 pound on one side, and 3 pounds on the other side, that would equal weighing 2 pounds. If you weigh 2 pounds of hay on the 1 pound side, and it is equal with the 3 pound side, you know you have 2 pounds of hay.To weigh 4 pounds, you put the 1 and the 3 together.
So if you follow this logic, you will see that the amounts have to be powers of 3 and there are four powers of 3 between 1 and 40: 1 pound (30), 3 pounds (31), 9 pounds (32), and 27 pounds (33), and these four add up to 40. Pretty slick, huh?
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Wisdom
Obsolete Words. (You still find these occasionally; sometimes in the old King James Bibles!) Demonstrates how words and usage change.
anon – soon, shortly (“I will come anon.”)
betimes – early, promptly
peradventure – perhaps, maybe
yclept – called, named (“A knight yclept Sir Gareth…”)
hark – listen (“Hark! The herald angels . . .”)
prithee – I pray thee; please
fain – gladly, willingly
nigh – near
ere – before
whilom – once upon a time
shew – actually, just an obsolete spelling of “show”
begotten – born
espoused – engaged
buckler – a small, round shield
manger – a feed trough for animals
Contronyms (single words that have opposite meanings depending on the context)
Sanction – to approve (“The committee sanctioned the project”) / to penalize (“The country was sanctioned for violations”).
Oversight – supervision (“She has oversight of the department”) / an error by neglect (“It was an oversight on my part”).
Dust – to remove fine particles (“I dusted the shelves”) / to apply fine particles (“I dusted the cake with sugar”).
Left – remaining (“Only one slice left”) / departed (“She left the room”).
Trim – to decorate (“Trim the tree”) / to cut away (“Trim the hedge”).
Bound – heading toward (“She’s bound for Paris”) / restrained (“He was bound by ropes”).
Cleave – to split apart (“Cleave the log in two”) / to cling to (“Cleave to your principles”).
Seed – to plant seeds (“Seed the garden”) / to remove seeds (“Seed the watermelon”).
Screen – to show (“They screened the movie”) / to hide (“Screen the porch from the sun”).
Weather – to withstand (“Weather the storm”) / to be worn away (“The rock weathered over time”).
Fast – quick (“He runs fast”) / fixed, unmoving (“The rope was held fast”).
Clip – to attach (“Clip the papers together”) / to cut off (“Clip the coupon”).
Apology – expression of regret (“He gave an apology”) / formal defense or justification (“Plato’s Apology”).
Peruse – to read carefully / to skim casually (usage has shifted over time).
Bolt – to secure (“Bolt the door”) / to flee (“The horse bolted”).
Overlook – to supervise (“She overlooked the project”) / to miss noticing (“He overlooked the typo”).
Go – to proceed (“Go ahead”) / to fail or be spent (“The battery has gone”).
Dusty – covered in dust (“Dusty shelves”) / sprinkled with dust-like particles (“Dusty snow on the mountain”).
Temper – to soften (“Temper justice with mercy”) / to strengthen (“Tempered steel”).
Out – visible (“The stars are out”) / extinguished (“The fire is out”).
Spreading wings in a perplexing world August, 2025 James P. Hurd
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Contents
Writer’s Corner
Blessed Unbeliever
This month’s story: “Delivering the Orange Daily News”
This month’s puzzler: “The Broken Stone”
WINGSPREAD ezine subscription information
Wisdom
Writer’s Corner
Writer’s tip: You can indent the first line of each paragraph but do not indent the first line of the first paragraph in your article or story, or the first line following a major subheading or break in the story.
Complaint of the month: Autocorrect has become my worst enema.
Task for you: Write a 100-word story using only dialogue. Dialogue grabs the readers’ attention. Remember, each change of speaker needs a new paragraph.
Button Children’s Books. A delightful story of a chubby, fuzzy little bear and his friends who live in the 100-acre wood. Winnie is a “bear of little brain” but he has a heart of gold. Good stories to reread in these troubled times
The only kind of writing is rewriting. Ernest Hemingway
Check out my BLESSED UNBELIEVER novel
Available in paper or Kindle version at Wipf and Stock Publishers, Amazon https://a.co/d/9su5F3o or wherever good books are sold.
New story: Delivering the Orange Daily News
I got off my bike, leaned it against the brick wall of the news alley and stared through the barred window at the bubbling pot of molten lead. This was the first day of my first job―delivering newspapers for the Orange Daily News. . . .
The Daily News hired Johnny to be part delivery supervisor and part wet nurse. He worked with the paperboys, handling screw-ups and drying tears. Johnny told us, “You guys are entrepreneurs, independent businessmen.” Turns out that meant less liability for the paper—and we had to eat our losses. He would take us out door-knocking―a bleak task where we tried to sign up new subscribers. But how sell something you weren’t crazy about yourself? We liked Johnny who organized games in the YMCA gym and told a few dirty jokes. He would hold up an orange, army-type hat with “Orange Daily News” printed on the side and say, “You’ll get one of these cool hats and for every five new subscribers you sign up, you’ll get to pin on one of these shiny buttons.” I thought, I’d rather just get more cash. . . . To read more, click here:https://tinyurl.com/4k73pdcb
Substack access: The article is on Substack but I haven’t yet learned how to grant public assess to it.
Leave a comment on the website and share with others. Thanks.
This month’s puzzler, “The Broken Stone.” Thanks to “Car Talk Archives“
This is a non-automotive puzzler. Here we go.
Years ago, somewhere far, far away.
A farmer had a 40-pound stone, which he could use to weigh 40 pounds of feed or hay.
He would sell feed in 40-pound bundles and hay in 40-pound bales. He had a balance scale. He put the stone on one side, and he piled the other side with feed or hay. When it balanced, he knew he had enough to sell.
Then one day, a neighbor borrowed the stone. But he had to apologize when he returned it because he had broken it into four pieces. And he felt really bad about it.
As it turns out, the farmer who owned the stone later told the neighbor that he actually had done him a favor.
The pieces of the broken stone could now be used to weigh any item, assuming those items were in one-pound increments, from one pound to 40 pounds, so the farmer thought this was a great improvement.
So the puzzler is, what were the weights of the 4 individual stones after the large stone was broken?
And here’s the hint―how would you weigh 2 pounds?
Good luck!
(Answer will appear in next month’s WINGSPREAD newsletter.)
Answer to last month’s puzzler:
Recall you have to decide which of three switches on the first floor turns on a light on the third floor. You’re allowed to go up and check the lightbulb only once.
Here is the answer.
Turn all the switches off.
Then you turn the first switch on and you leave it on for 10 minutes.
Then you turn it off and turn the second switch on.
You leave the third switch in the off position.
Then, you go upstairs to check the light.
When you get upstairs, if the bulb is on, then you know it is switch #2.
If the bulb is off, and it is cold, then it is switch #3.
If the bulb is warm, then you know it is switch #1.
And that is how you do it.
Oldy but goodie.
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Wisdom
An historic 1946 picture from Mission Aviation Fellowship archives of Betty Green, one of the founders and first pilot with the mission. In the background is her Grumman J2F Duck―a bi-wing, radial-engine amphibian that she flew in New Guinea. I was privileged to know this godly, gracious woman.
Spelled the same, but different pronunciations and different meanings:
1) The bandage was wound around the wound.
2) The farm was used to produce produce.
3) The dump was so full that it had to refuse more refuse.
4) We must polish the Polish furniture.
5) He could lead if he would get the lead out.
6) The soldier decided to desert his dessert in the desert.
7) He thought a birthday was a good time to present the present.
8) A bass was painted on the head of the bass drum.
9) When shot at, the dove dove into the bushes.
10) I did not object to the object.
11) The insurance was invalid for the invalid.
12) There was a row among the oarsmen about how to row.
13) They were too close to the door to close it.
14) The buck does funny things when the does are present.
15) A seamstress and a sewer fell down into a sewer line.
16) To help with planting, the farmer taught his sow to sow.
17) The wind was too strong to wind the sail.
18) Upon seeing the tear in the painting, I shed a tear.
19) I had to subject the subject to a series of tests.
20) How can I intimate this to my most intimate friend?
I called Willow Street, Pennsylvania cemetery about a tombstone for Barbara and me. Sticker shock–expensive. I delayed a month but finally called back and ordered one. They’ll put Barbara’s birth and death year on it and my birth year and a dash. Turns out they’ll charge me extra when they have to come back and chisel in my death date. So I think I’ll just ask them to put in “2060” right now. I figure it’ll give me something to shoot for.
I must be getting stronger. Last year I couldn’t even carry $50 of groceries with my two hands. James P Hurd
Spreading wings in a perplexing world July, 2025 James P. Hurd
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Contents
Writer’s Corner
Blessed Unbeliever
This month’s story: “On A Roll”
This month’s puzzler: light switches
WINGSPREAD Ezine subscription information
Wisdom
Writer’s Corner
Writer’s tip: Start your novel or story in media res (“in the middle of things”). For instance, you could start it just before or just after a crisis, peaking the reader’s interest. You can then double back and tell the story more chronologically.
Word of the month:NERDSPLAINING (I made this one up!) This refers to a very intelligent person explaining something but using words and ideas you’ve never heard of.
Task for you: Write a story of 100 words without using any adjectives or adverbs (good practice in using fewer, more direct words). Here’s a prompt: The most unusual holiday I ever spent.
BLESSED UNBELIEVER novel
Available in paper or Kindle version at Wipf and Stock Publishers, Amazon https://a.co/d/9su5F3o or wherever good books are sold.
New story: “On A Roll”
After flying to San Francisco, embracing my dear California sister and catching up on our lives, I get up to use the bathroom. It smells fresh and has a new towel laid out. But when I reach for the toilet paper, it’s facing the wall—backwards!
I’ve known Anne all my life―her opposite political persuasion, her preference for a different kind of church. None of this ever came between us. But the toilet paper shakes me. Where did she learn this? I don’t remember this happening in our childhood home. If she does this to the toilet paper what else is she hiding? Uncontrolled passive aggression? Anger issues? Never before have I noticed any serious issues. Did she do it on purpose? . . .
This month’s puzzler (thanks to “Car Talk” puzzlers)
This one is complicated, so make sure you concentrate!
There are three on/off switches on the wall on the first floor of a building.
You can tell when they’re switched on or off because they are either clicked up for on, or down for off, like a light switch.
You don’t know which of these three switches controls an incandescent lamp on the third floor of the building. The other two are not connected to anything and don’t do anything at all.
You are allowed to toggle the switches on or off as many times as you please.
Further, you are allowed to walk just once to the third floor to check the lamp to see if it is on or not.
So, how can you know which switch controls the lamp on the third floor?
(Answer will appear in next month’s WINGSPREAD newsletter.)
Answer to last month’s puzzler:
What was the man buying in the hardware store if one costs 60 cents, but 200 costs only $1.80?
He was buying house numbers, the little numbers you put on your house!
He lives at house number 200. So he just needs three numbers: a two and two zeros. Three times 60 cents equals $1.80.
Good one.
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Wisdom
Musings on Love
“Love is sharing your popcorn.” – Charles Schultz
“Gravitation is not responsible for people falling in love.” – Albert Einstein
“Love is an ocean of emotions entirely surrounded by expenses.” – Thomas Dewar
“I love you more than coffee, but please don’t make me prove it.” – Anonymous
“A guy knows he’s in love when he loses interest in his car for a couple of days.” – Tim Allen
“Marriage is like a walk in the park. Jurassic Park.” – Anonymous
“Love is being stupid together.” – Paul Valery
“Honesty is the key to a relationship. If you can fake that, you’re in.” – Richard Jeni
“Forget love, I’d rather fall in chocolate.” – Anonymous
“My wife and I were happy for twenty years – then we met.” – Rodney Dangerfield
“My wife has a slight impediment in her speech. Every now and then she stops to breathe.” – Jimmy Durante
“Love is the only kind of fire that is never covered by insurance.” – Anonymous
“If love is the answer, could you rephrase the question?” – Lily Tomlin
The joys of family life
“Insanity is hereditary; you get it from your children.” – Sam Levenson
“Happiness is having a large, loving, caring, close-knit family in another city.” – George Burns
“Having children is like living in a frat house – nobody sleeps, everything’s broken, and there’s a lot of throwing up.” – Ray Romano
“A family reunion is an effective form of birth control.” – Robert A. Heinlein
“The advantage of growing up with siblings is that you become very good at fractions.” – Anonymous
“Remember, as far as anyone knows, we are a nice, normal family.” – Homer Simpson
“Home, nowadays, is a place where part of the family waits until the rest of the family brings the car back.” – Earl Wilson
“A family is a unit composed not only of children but of men, women, an occasional animal, and the common cold.” – Ogden Nash
“Being part of a family means smiling for photos.” – Harry Morgan
“The other night I ate at a real nice family restaurant. Every table had an argument going.” – George Carlin
“The family is one of nature’s masterpieces.” – George Santayana
Classic One-Liners
“I always arrive late at the office, but I make up for it by leaving early.” – Anonymous
“Sometimes I lie awake at night, and I ask, ‘Where have I gone wrong?’ Then a voice says to me, ‘This is going to take more than one night.’” – Charlie Brown
“If you think nobody cares if you’re alive, try missing a couple of car payments.” – Earl Wilson
“My fake plants died because I did not pretend to water them.” – Mitch Hedberg
“I told my wife she was drawing her eyebrows too high. She looked surprised.” – Anonymous
“I want my children to have all the things I couldn’t afford. Then I want to move in with them.” – Phyllis Diller
“I used to think I was indecisive, but now I’m not so sure.” – Anonymous
“I’m writing a book. I’ve got the page numbers done.” – Steven Wright
“A clear conscience is usually the sign of a bad memory.” – Steven Wright
“I dream of a better tomorrow, where chickens can cross the road and not be questioned about their motives.” – Anonymous
“I refuse to join any club that would have me as a member.” – Groucho Marx
“Always borrow money from a pessimist. He won’t expect it back.” – Oscar Wilde
“Behind every great man is a woman rolling her eyes.” – Jim Carrey
Spreading wings in a perplexing world June, 2025 James P. Hurd
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Contents
Writer’s Corner
Blessed Unbeliever
This month’s story
This month’s puzzler
WINGSPREAD Ezine subscription information
Wisdom
Writer’s Corner
Writer’s tip: “If it sounds like writing, I rewrite it.” Elmore Leonard
Word of the month:DEIPNOSOPHIST: An expert in the art of discourse while dining
Task for you: Find a piece of writing that you really enjoy and use it as a template for your own writing: style, vocabulary, metaphors, characterizations, description of scenes, plot.
BLESSED UNBELIEVER novel
I confess I sometimes more enjoy talking to atheists than to Christians. My atheist friends seem honest about their doubts. Although my own doubts have been addressed, they have not been quenched. I believe we are all on a spiritual quest and I wish to know the quest of each person I meet. Blessed Unbeliever (below) is the story of one such quest. Much is autobiographical (I won’t tell you which parts!). But the names have been changed to protect the innocent.
Blessed Unbeliever (paper or Kindle version) can be found at Wipf and Stock Publishers, Amazon https://a.co/d/9su5F3o or wherever good books are sold.
New story: “Venturing Beyond the Pale”
*Note: This is a different kind of essay where I trace my personal journey from fundamentalism into a more ecumenical faith.
“The President,” sarcastically so called because he was thermometer-thin, unathletic and mute, sat alone on a bench near the Orange High School snack shop. I felt pressure rising in my gut as I sat down to “witness” to him about how all people are sinners and how he needed to “accept Christ” to escape eternal damnation. He said nothing. After about twenty minutes I got up and walked away—and never spoke to him again. My most embarrassing day in high school; I felt like I had committed a violation.
Witnessing to The President was an example of what fundamentalists did. . . . To read more, click here:https://tinyurl.com/asepunwc
Leave a comment on the website and share with others. Thanks.
This month’s puzzler (thanks to “Car Talk” archives)
Years ago, back in the 80’s, a guy walks into a hardware store to purchase something for his house.
He asks the clerk, “How much is one?”
The clerk says, “60 cents.”
And the guys say, “Okay, how much for 12?”
The clerk says, “$1.20.”
So the guy says, “Okay then. I’ll take 200.”
And the clerk says, “That’ll be $1.80.”
And the puzzler is very simple.
What was he buying?
Good luck, friends.
(Answer will appear in next month’s WINGSPREAD newsletter.)
Answer to last month’s puzzler:
How start building a bridge across Niagara Falls? They held a kite-flying contest. The first kid to be able to get his kite to land on the other side of Niagara gorge won the contest.
So once the kite was across, they attached a rope to the kite string and pulled it across. And they did this with the rope until they were able to pull the cable across. Pretty brilliant.
And the kid’s name was Homan Walsh, a 16-year-old kid from Ireland who won the contest and made history.
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Wisdom
C.S. Lewis’s stepson tells the story of a time when Lewis was walking with a friend and a person on the street came up and asked him for spare change. Lewis emptied his pockets and gave it all to the man, and once he had left, the friend challenged him, “You shouldn’t have given that man all that money, he’ll only spend it on drink.” To which Lewis replied, “Well, if I’d kept it, I would have only spent it on drink.”
The upward path of human evolution
Empathy. These eleven short stories make us think twice about the daily happenings in our lives.
1. Today, I interviewed my grandmother for part of a research paper I’m working on for my Psychology class. When I asked her to define success in her own words, she said; “Success is when you look back at your life and the memories make you smile.”
2. Today, after my 72 hour shift at the fire station, a woman ran up to me at the grocery store and gave me a hug. When I tensed up, she realized I didn’t recognize her. She let go with tears of joy in her eyes and the most sincere smile and said; “On 9-11-2001, you carried me out of the World Trade Center.”
3. Today, after I watched my dog get run over by a car, I sat on the side of the road holding him and crying. And just before he died, He licked the tears off my face.
4. Today at 7 AM, I woke up feeling ill, but decided I needed the money, so I went into work. At 3 PM I got laid off. On my drive home I got a flat tire. When I went into the trunk for the spare, it was flat too.
A man in a BMW pulled over, gave me a ride, we chatted, and then he offered me a job. I start tomorrow.
5. Today, as my father, three brothers, and two sisters stood around my mother’s hospital bed, my mother uttered her last coherent words before she died.
She simply said, “I feel so loved right now. We should have gotten together like this more often.”
6. Today, I kissed my dad on the forehead as he passed away in a small hospital bed. About 5 seconds after he passed, I realized it was the first time I had given him a kiss since I was a little boy.
7. Today, in the cutest voice, my 8-year-old daughter asked me to start recycling. I chuckled and asked, “Why?” She replied, “So you can help me save the planet.” I chuckled again and asked, “And why do you want to save the planet?”
Because that’s where I keep all my stuff,” she said.
8. Today, when I witnessed a 27-year-old breast cancer patient laughing hysterically at her 2-year-old daughter’s antics, I suddenly realized that I need to stop complaining about my life and start celebrating it again.
9. Today, a boy in a wheelchair saw me desperately struggling on crutches with my broken leg and offered to carry my backpack and books for me. He helped me all the way across campus to my class and as he was leaving he said, “I hope you feel better soon.”
10. Today, I was feeling down because the results of a biopsy came back malignant. When I got home, I opened an e-mail that said, “Thinking of you today. If you need me, I’m a phone call away.” It was from a high school friend I hadn’t seen in 10 years.
11. Today, I was traveling in Kenya and I met a refugee from Zimbabwe. He said he hadn’t eaten anything in over 3 days and looked extremely skinny and unhealthy. Then my friend offered him the rest of the sandwich he was eating. The first thing the man said was, “We can share it.”
Wingspread 
