Tag Archives: Wingspread

WINGSPREAD Ezine for August, 2021


“Spreading your wings in a perplexing world”

August, 2021                                    James P. Hurd

Please forward, and share this E-zine with anyone. Thank you.

Contents

  • New story: The Christmas Arrest
  • Puzzler for August
  • Writer’s Corner
  • How to purchase Wingspread: A Memoir of Faith and Flying
  • Wingspread E-zine subscription information

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 New story: The Christmas Arrest

 One night in the spring of my senior year, Gary and Ron and I decided to drive past “No Trespassing” signs into a Nike anti-aircraft missile base, raising a cloud of dust on the unpaved road. Immediately, a passing squad lit up and chased us in.

What were we doing? Here in Orange County, California, we were inside the perimeter of a secure site where ground-to-air missiles were poised like deadly darts to thwart any air attack against the U.S.

Gary panicked.  “Tell him you didn’t see the second No Trespassing sign!”

“Wait a minute, Gary,” I said. “Think that through a bit . . .”    To read more, click here:   https://jimhurd.com/2021/08/09/the-christmas-arrest/

(*Please leave a comment on the website. Thanks.)

Puzzler for August: The Interchangeable Part

What part of a car is virtually interchangeable with virtually any other car, whether it’s foreign or domestic, let’s say within the last 30 years?

And don’t say something silly like motor oil! It’s not liquid…. It’s an actual piece that you can take out of any car, no matter where in the world it was made, and it would fit on any other car.

So, what is it?

 (Answer in next month’s Ezine)

Remember July’s puzzler: The trash truck that weighed 40 pounds less?

Why did the truck weigh 40 pounds less the second time it exited the trash dump than it did the first time it exited? Exact same truck.

Answer: 

The reason the truck weighed 40 pounds less is that it had burned 40 pounds of fuel or about six gallons.

Writers’ Corner

Watch for my upcoming novel: East Into Unbelief (provisional title)

Sean loses his father, his best girlfriend, his life dream, and finally, his faith. But how can he be a good atheist, especially when he’s stuck at Torrey Bible Institute? He can’t see it, but grace is coming . . .

Tip of the month: If your story is bogging down, introduce a plot twist: someone falls ill or dies; a person from long ago shows up again; something unexplainable happens; someone confides a dark secret; someone acts completely out of character; someone goes missing; etc. That’ll perk ‘er up.

Word of the Month:  Paraprosdokians

My word processor flags this as a misspelled word, but Winston Churchill would disagree. Paraprosdokians refer to sentences where the last part is surprising or unexpected. Churchill and Groucho Marx used these often. (See examples below.)

Buy James Hurd’s Wingspread: A Memoir of Faith and Flying  How childhood (Fundamentalist) faith led to mission bush-piloting in South America—and Barbara. Buy it here:  https://jimhurd.com/home/  (or order it at Barnes and Noble, Amazon, etc.) 

See pics here related to Wingspread: Of Faith and Flying: http://www.pinterest.com/hurd1149/wingspread-of-faith-and-flying/

Follow “james hurd” on Facebook, or “@hurdjp” on Twitter

Subscribe free to this Ezine  

Click here https://jimhurd.com/home/  to subscribe to this WINGSPREAD ezine, sent direct to your email inbox, every month. You will receive a free article for subscribing. Please share this URL with interested friends, “like” it on Facebook, retweet on Twitter, etc.

If you wish to unsubscribe from this Wingspread Ezine, send an email to hurd@usfamily.net and put in the subject line: “unsubscribe.” (I won’t feel bad, promise!) Thanks.

Our lives in the 21st century

Winston Churchill loved paraprosdokians: figures of speech in which the latter part of a sentence or phrase is surprising or unexpected.

  1. Where there’s a will, I want to be in it.
  2. The last thing I want to do is hurt you, but it’s still on my list.
  3. Since light travels faster than sound, some people appear bright until you hear them speak.
  4. If I agreed with you, we’d both be wrong.
  5. War does not determine who is right – only who is left.
  6. Knowledge is knowing a tomato is a fruit. Wisdom is not putting it in a fruit salad.
  7. They begin the evening news with ‘Good Evening,’ then proceed to tell you why it isn’t.
  8. To steal ideas from one person is plagiarism. To steal from many is research.
  9. I thought I wanted a career. Turns out, I just wanted pay checks.
  10. In filling out an application, where it says, “In case of emergency, notify:” I put “DOCTOR.”
  11. I didn’t say it was your fault, I said I was blaming you.
  12. Women will never be equal to men until they can walk down the street with a bald head and a beer gut, and still think they are sexy.
  13. Behind every successful man is his woman. Behind the fall of a successful man is usually another woman.
  14. A clear conscience is the sign of a fuzzy memory.
  15. You do not need a parachute to skydive. You only need a parachute to skydive twice.
  16. Money can’t buy happiness, but it sure makes misery easier to live with.
  17. There’s a fine line between cuddling and holding someone down so they can’t get away.
  18. I used to be indecisive. Now I’m not so sure.
  19. You’re never too old to learn something stupid.
  20. Nostalgia isn’t what it used to be.
  21. Change is inevitable, except from a vending machine.
  22. Going to church doesn’t make you a Christian any more than standing in a garage makes you a car.
  23. I’m supposed to respect my elders, but now it’s getting harder and harder for me to find any.

WINGSPREAD Ezine for October, 2020

“Spreading your wings in a perplexing world”
October, 2020                                                             James Hurd    

Please forward this Ezine, and share this Ezine with friends. Thank you.

Contents

New story: “Mission to Mexico”

Puzzler

Writer’s Corner

How to purchase Wingspread: A Memoir of Faith and Flying

Wingspread E-zine subscription information

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New story: Mission to Mexico

Fulton turned to Sean. “K-Kennedy’s a Catholic. Don’t ya’ll know Catholics follow the pope? They w-worship the Virgin, and believe you receive s-salvation by your good works. Anyway, Kennedy’s a D-Democrat” [pronounced like a curse].

Most Fundamentalists distrusted Democrats because they held liberal views on sex and marriage and supported the United Nations, an entity that would create a one-world government headed by the Antichrist himself. Both candidates had prepared well for the debate, but John Kennedy’s Boston accent riveted his audience with well-turned phrases.

After the debates all the TBI people Sean talked to said they would vote for Richard Nixon—a Republican and card-carrying Quaker. Sean told Fulton, “Nixon comes from Yorba Linda, just a few miles from my home. John Kennedy comes from the East. But he’s charismatic, inspiring, young and an excellent debater. I’m voting for Kennedy. . . . .”

To read more, click here:   https://jimhurd.com/2020/10/01/mission-to-mexico/

(*Please leave a comment on the website. Thanks.)

New Challenge for our Ezine readers:

Send in the name of your all-time favorite book (include author and complete title) and state why it is your favorite. I’ll publish some of these in the next Wingspread Ezine.

Answer to last month’s puzzler:

Recall that the challenge was to get a brittle piece of slate installed in an opening in the oak floor of exactly the same size. The wise man used an elegant tool from the kitchen: the ice cube tray from the freezer. He simply placed a few strategic ice cubes on the sub-floor and balanced the slate on top of those. As the ice cubes melted, the slate lowered itself into the hole.

Correct answers: Doug Inwards, Eldon Eddy, Jenell Paris, Sam Palpant, Paul Wilson . . .  Congratulations!

Writers’ Corner

Word of the Month:  Fake news.

This term refers to national news that happens to contradict my own strongly-held opinions. Believing that a report is fake news allows me to discount it, and continue to embrace the gossip and prejudices of people who see the world as I do.

Book of the month: Celtic Daily Prayer. Harper. I’ve used this prayer guide for 20 years. Conceived in the Northumbria community of northern England, it provides Scripture and a reading for each day of the year (two-year cycle), along with sketches of great Celtic Christians and great events of pre-Catholic Christianity in England and Scotland.

Watch for my upcoming novel: EAST INTO UNBELIEF (provisional title)

Sean loseshis father, his best girlfriend, his life dream, and even his faith. Why is he doing now at Torrey Bible Institute? How can he restructure his life as an atheist? He could not perceive it, but grace was coming. . . .

Adult truths:

  1. Sometimes I’ll look down at my watch three consecutive times and still not know what time it is.
  2. Nothing sucks more than that moment during an argument when you realize you’re wrong.

3. I hear proofreading is being abolished . . . Is nothing scared . . .?

4. I totally take back all those times I didn’t want to nap when I was younger.

5. There is great need for a sarcasm font.

6. How on earth are you supposed to fold a fitted sheet?

7. Was learning cursive really necessary?

8. MapQuest really needs to start their directions on #5. I’m pretty sure I know how to get out of my own neighborhood.

9. Obituaries would be a lot more interesting if they told you how the person died.

10.  I can’t remember the last time I wasn’t at least kind of tired.

11. Bad decisions make good stories.

12. You never know when it will strike, but there comes a moment when you know that you just aren’t going to do anything productive for the rest of the day.

Heavenly organization:

Buy James Hurd’s Wingspread: A Memoir of Faith and Flying.

How childhood (Fundamentalist) faith led to mission bush-piloting in South America—and Barbara. Buy it here:  https://jimhurd.com/home/  (or order it at Barnes and Noble, Amazon, etc.) 

See pics here related to Wingspread: Of Faith and Flying: http://www.pinterest.com/hurd1149/wingspread-of-faith-and-flying/

Follow “james hurd” on Facebook, or “@hurdjp” on Twitter

Subscribe free to this Ezine   Click here https://jimhurd.com/home/  to subscribe to this WINGSPREAD ezine, sent direct to your email inbox, every month. You will receive a free article for subscribing. Please share this URL with interested friends, “like” it on Facebook, retweet on Twitter, etc.

If you wish to unsubscribe from this Wingspread Ezine, send an email to hurd@usfamily.net and put in the subject line: “unsubscribe.” (I won’t feel bad, promise!) Thanks.

WINGSPREAD Ezine for August, 2020


“Spreading your wings in a perplexing world”

August, 2020                                    James P. Hurd    

Please forward this Ezine to anyone. Thank you.

Contents

New story: The Great Debate

Wingspread reader challenge

Puzzler of the month

Writer’s Corner

How to purchase Wingspread: A Memoir of Faith and Flying

Wingspread Ezine subscription information

*********************

New story: The Great Debate

. . . Sean knew that TBI housed speakers on Norbert Hall’s sixth floor, but still he was surprised when he walked into the elevator and almost bumped into a scowling G. Victor McGraw. Sean stood transfixed, feeling like Moses gazing at the burning bush. But this “bush” didn’t say anything, except: “I’m going to first floor,” spoken as if someone had put sand in his toothpaste. In his sixties, gray-haired, furrowed brow, he exuded the demeanor of a man of God. He didn’t look at Sean as they descended, but when they exited the elevator, he broke wind.

Sean had loved to listen to McGraw’s radio messages—“Dear friends, all people on the topside of God’s earth need salvation. . . .” In his TBI chapel talk, he seemed the epitome of charm and grace. Sean wondered which man was the real G. Victor McGraw. . . . To read more, click here: https://jimhurd.com/2020/08/10/the-great-debate/

(*Request: After reading the article, please leave a comment on the website. Thanks.)

New Challenge for our Ezine readers!

Send in the name of one of your all-time favorite books (author and complete title) and one sentence telling why it is your favorite. I’ll publish some of these in the next Wingspread Ezine.

Puzzler of the month:

(From Malcolm Ross McDonald) I will use a fountain pen with black ink and write my signature on a plain, blank paper, anywhere on the paper. Now, I will draw something else on the paper which will be plainly visible.

When you look at my signature through a magnifying glass, you’ll not be surprised to find out that it’s enlarged. But when you look at the other thing, it is NOT enlarged. The question is: What is the other thing? (Answer next week.)

Answer to last week’s puzzler: 

You have a four-ounce glass and a nine-ounce glass. You have an endless supply of water. You can fill or dump either glass. It turns out that it’s possible to measure six ounces of water using just these two glasses. What’s the fewest number of steps in which you can measure six ounces?

First, fill the 9-ounce glass with water.

Next, pour the water from the 9-ounce glass into the 4-ounce glass, until it is full. This leaves 5 ounces in the 9-ounce glass.

Now empty the 4-ounce glass.

Now, fill the 4-ounce glass, using the remaining water from the 9-ounce glass. Once the 4-ounce glass is filled, you’ll be left with just 1-ounce of water in the 9-ounce glass.

Empty the 4-ounce glass of water again.

Transfer the 1-ounce of water from the 9-ounce glass into the 4-ounce glass.

Again, fill the 9-ounce glass with water.

Pour water from the 9-ounce glass into the 4-ounce glass, until the 4-ounce glass is full.

Since the four-ounce glass already has 1-ounce of water in it, it will only take an additional 3-ounces of water. Guess how much that leaves in the 9-ounce glass? You

Writers’ Corner

Author of the Month:  James Albert Michener was born in 1907 and lived for ninety years. His breakout novel, Tales of the South Pacific, later became a motion picture. Some of his other novels: HawaiiThe DriftersCentennialThe SourceThe Fires of SpringChesapeakeCaribbeanCaravansAlaska, and Texas. Many of his books are multigenerational, with long time spans in one geographic area. He donated millions of dollars to Swarthmore College; the University of Texas, Austin; and the Iowa Writers Workshop. A postal stamp was issued in his honor in 2008.

Watch for my upcoming novel: East Into Unbelief (provisional title). Kathleen’s mother raises her in a Fundamentalist hot-house environment. But then, disaster. How can her mother accept Kathleen’s choices? And how can her boyfriend, Sean, ever forgive her?

Words to ponder

Now that we’re into our seventh month of fighting COVID-19, I’ve got some thoughts and questions:

What you’re telling me is that my chance of surviving all this is directly linked to the common sense of others? You’re kidding, right?

So lemme see, there’s no cure for a virus that can be killed by sanitizer and hand soap?

Is it too early to put up the Christmas tree? I’ve run out of things to do.

When this virus thing is over with, I still want some of you to stay away from me.

If these last months have taught us anything, it’s that stupidity travels faster than any virus on the planet.

Wait a second—what you’re telling me is that my chance of surviving all this is directly linked to the common sense of others? You’re kidding, right?

People are scared of getting fined or arrested for congregating in crowds, as if catching a deadly disease and dying a horrible death wasn’t enough of a deterrent.

If you believe all this will end and we will get back to normal just because we reopen everything, raise your hand. Now slap yourself with it.

Another Saturday night in the house and I just realized the trash goes out more often than I do.

Whoever decided a liquor store is more essential than a hair salon is obviously a bald-headed alcoholic.

The spread of Covid-19 is based on two factors: a. How dense the population is and b. How dense the population is.

Did a big load of pajamas so I would have enough clean work clothes for this week.

It may take a village to raise a child, but I swear it’s going to take a whole vineyard to home-school one.

Remember all those times when you wished the weekend would last forever? Well, wish granted. Happy now?

And another gem for our Catholic friends:

Buy James Hurd’s Wingspread: A Memoir of Faith and Flying.  How childhood (Fundamentalist) faith led to mission bush-piloting in South America—and Barbara. Buy it here:  https://jimhurd.com/home/  (or order it at Barnes and Noble, Amazon, etc.) 

See pics here related to Wingspread: Of Faith and Flying: http://www.pinterest.com/hurd1149/wingspread-of-faith-and-flying/

Follow “james hurd” on Facebook, or “@hurdjp” on Twitter

Subscribe free to this Ezine   Click here https://jimhurd.com/home/  to subscribe to WINGSPREAD Ezine, sent direct to your email inbox, usually every month. You will receive a free article for subscribing. Please share this URL with interested friends, “like” it on Facebook, retweet on Twitter, etc.

If you wish to unsubscribe from this Wingspread Ezine, send an email to hurd@usfamily.net and say in the subject line: “unsubscribe.” (I won’t feel bad, promise!) Thanks.